NewsLo
  • Today’s Headlines
  • Featured
  • US
  • Politics
  • World
  • Media
  • Sports
  • Privacy Policy
Subscribe
NewsLo
NewsLo
  • Home
  • Business
    • Accounting
    • Advertising
    • Branding
    • Career
    • Customer Service
    • Cyber Security
    • Entrepreneur
    • Jobs
    • Management
    • Marketing
    • Non Profit
    • Search Engine Optimization
    • Sales
    • Web Design
  • Finance
    • Banking
    • Bankruptcy
    • Budgeting
    • Credit
    • Debt
    • Estate Wills & Trusts
    • Home Improvements
    • Law
    • Loans
    • Personal Finance
    • Taxes
    • Shopping
  • Investment
    • Crypto Currency
    • Gold & Silver
    • Hard Assets
    • Real Estate
    • Retirement
    • Stocks & Bonds
    • Trading
  • Real Estate
    • Buying
    • Selling
    • Commercial Construction
    • Construction Law
    • Home Improvement
    • Loans
    • Property Management
    • Real Estate Laws
    • Rental Property
  • Insurance
    • Auto Insurance
    • Commercial Real Estate Insurance
    • Crop Insurance
    • Dental Insurance
    • Disability Insurance
    • Health Insurance
    • Home Owners Insurance
    • Identity Theft Protection
    • Insurance Law
    • Investment Insurance
  • Contact Us
  • World

Americans Fear Kim Jong-un’s Plan to Attack United States, but Just Can’t Resist Those Chubby Cheeks

  • January 28, 2013
  • News Lo
Kim_Jong_Un
(Photo Credit: Arcadio Esquivel)
Total
0
Shares
0
0
0

PYONGYANG — North Korea’s latest threats against the international community, and the United States in particular, have left many worried whether the rogue nation might actually follow through on an attack. But while the vast majority of Americans agree that they find the prospect of a nuclear North Korea with long-range rocket capabilities harrowing, many just can’t resist Supreme Leader Kim Jung-un’s doughy, rollie pollie cheeks.

“The idea of a nuclear North Korea with advanced weaponry is terrifying. There’s no predicting what Kim Jong-un might do with long-range rockets and nukes. But when I see him walk on stage all chubby and cute, I just want to go to town on those cheeks like a Jewish grandmother at a Bar Mitzvah,” said 27-year-old Joan Davis, before trailing off and making unintelligible baby-talk noises.

“I find his regime disgusting, but I find his perpetual schoolboy-on-picture-day look to be a real treat,” agreed 43-year-old Alan Davies, a tax attorney and father of two.

Even outgoing Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta has stated that while Kim Jung-un has made it clear that under his regime will be no kinder or gentler than Kim Jong-il’s, there are times he can’t help but finding their new Supreme Leader flat-out adorable.

“North Korea’s actions over the last week serve as proof that Kim Jung-un is every bit as ruthless and untrustworthy as his father,” said Panetta. “Still, something about that ‘Little Rascals’ haircut and puppy dog face make me think, man, he can’t be all bad.”

Total
0
Shares
Share 0
Tweet 0
Pin it 0
Related Topics
  • Kim Jong Un
  • Kim Jong Un North Korea
  • Kim Jong Un threatening an attack
  • North Korea rogue nation
  • North Korea's Kim Jong Un
  • threatening attack
  • world humor
Avatar of News Lo
News Lo

Welcome to Newslo! Our team of dedicated authors strives to deliver the latest and most important info on finance while infusing a dose of our own style to give you a unique experience. Whether you're looking for in-depth discussions on investments or solid finance tips, we have something for everyone. Our goal is to deliver you the best possible content. So, keep reading our articles and give us your feedback!

Previous Article
  • Politics

Obama Creates Drone Rules, Exempts CIA Drone Attacks from Rules

  • January 28, 2013
  • News Lo
View Post
Next Article
  • World

General Regrets Telling Prince Harry Wedding Party Was Taliban Regiment

  • January 29, 2013
  • News Lo
View Post
1 comment
  1. Avatar of Janice Smorgsen Janice Smorgsen says:
    January 28, 2013 at 11:21 pm

    He sucks, but oh god I love those cheeks.

Comments are closed.

NewsLo
  • Today’s Headlines
  • Featured
  • US
  • Politics
  • World
  • Media
  • Sports
  • Privacy Policy
Navigating the world of finance, one step at a time.

Input your search keywords and press Enter.