BUENOS AIRES — Following news of former British Prime Minister Margaret “The Iron Lady” Thatcher’s death due to a stroke at the age of 87, the nation of Argentina has announced that a grand celebration of remembrance. The event shall be held on the disputed Falkland Islands, or what Argentines refer to as the Malvinas, to commemorate Thatcher’s legacy.
“This will be a spectacular invasion of commemoration,” said Argentinean President Cristina Fernández de Kirchner. “Our hearts, and the Malvinas Islands, will be occupied by The Iron Lady’s memory, and Argentinian soldiers, for the rest of time.”
“Argentina is here to show that our support, enthusiasm, goodwill, and firepower stand behind the British people in their time of mourning,’ President de Kirchner continued. “We must ensure that Mrs. Thatcher’s promise to resolve the South Pacific crisis is not left unheard.”
Thatcher, who is credited with inspiring women to rise to leadership positions around the world and being a successful advocate for the free market and deregulation, was never a fan of the Argentine nation. During her tenure as Prime Minister, Argentina and the UK fought a short war over ownership of the disputed islands, which guaranteed her re-election in the face of growing discontent over her rule.
“Oi, would ya look at that? Look at ’em all. Right pickin’ beauts!” Falkland Island Councilwoman Shea Cuddihy exclaimed at the sight of Argentinian landing crafts and armored vehicles rolling through the capital of Stanley.
Soldiers, carrying rifles and pictures of Thatcher, marched through the streets and were welcomed as friends by the natives. The sounds of cheering could be heard throughout Stanley, as the British Union Jack was lowered, and in its place, a massive portrait of Prime Minister Thatcher was raised.
Below that, the Argentinian flag was also hoisted.
“Them Argies ain’t so bad once you get used to’em,” Cuddihy continued. “Maggie Thatch’d be mighty proud, they actin’ all civil and what not!”
The Falkland Islands/Malvinas have been disputed since the early 20th Century. Some experts say that the islands could be a flashpoint for a second war between Argentina and the U,K,, as many observers believe Argentina might launch false flag operation to distract its populace from a horrendous economy and a housing crisis.
However, on the Falklands themselves, the exuberance and cheerful celebration of Mrs. Thatcher’s life seems to be continuing unabated. The Thatcher Remembrance Occupation Force, as it has taken to calling itself, has not set a timetable for when the solemn memorials will end.
“I hope they brought pudding,” said one Stanley native, who was being pat down by Argentinian soldiers for weapons during an interview with Newslo. “I bloody love pudding.”
It’s not just the up-to-the-minute reporting that makes this such a vital read. It’s like having a picture painted behind my eyes, and it makes me feel almost like I’m there. I still don’t know where “there” is (one of those Channel Islands that are so popular now?), but that’s not so important
Comments are closed.