Bachmann Blames Comedy Central For Baseball Shooting Because “They Keep Mocking God So, Naturally, He Got Mad At Us”

A Republican former lawmaker who suggested Obama supported Islamic State militants and urged voters to take up arms over a proposed energy tax is now blaming Comedy Central for the shootings of two GOP congressmen. Michelle Bachman – who called on her constituents to become “armed and dangerous” over an emissions tax for energy production – rebuked comedians, media personalities and political figures for inspiring an Illinois man with a history of domestic violence to shoot two lawmakers and three others. “The assassin was a Bernie Sanders volunteer, Rachel Maddow fan, avid follower of Comedy Central and of Bill Maher,” Bachmann said. “The [would-be] assassin obviously listened well to his TV political ‘teachers’ and took his ‘resist’ marching orders to an unthinkable level, based upon the hysterical, fact deprived, profanity-laced ravings of the lunatic left.”

She continued, “And out of those that I’ve just mentioned, the worst possible influence on the man, I would imagine, was the doing of Comedy Central. So, if you were to ask me who I blame all of this on, it’s them. You see, many people don’t understand – and unfortunately, a handful of them does so perfectly – that television is an incredibly powerful medium designed to control the masses. I realize this may sound like a conspiracy theory, but if you just think about it for a second, you’ll realize that there’s truth to what I’m saying. We let our children be influenced by television programs that focus nowadays on profanity, casual sex and a complete absence of anything that remotely resembles family values and what we’re left with is, at best, people who grow up confused and completely out of place.”

“The trick is, they hide their true intentions very nicely by calling their programs ‘humor’ and ‘entertainment’ and terms similar to those, but in reality, they’re doing nothing more than selling junk and a warped sense of reality for profits,” Bachmann also said. “So, what we have here is a situation where generations upon generations of Americans were raised by television instead of their parents, and the way children learn is they imitate whatever they see. It’s the old monkey-see-monkey-do thing. But, the worst of the worst by far is Comedy Central; a television channel that supposedly deals with humor, but in doing so, steps over every possible boundary when it comes to taste and morals. To top it all off, their favorite thing to mess with is religion and God. They’re taking this all-important American value for granted and are saying the worst possible things about it to make money. It’s disgusting.”

Naturally, since it’s a very popular channel, a lot of people watch it daily. The more people watch it, the more it gains popularity and the more people start believing everything they hear over there, which is to say, an increasing number of people starts joking about religion on a daily basis. Furthermore, when you add to the equation how long the channel’s been in existence, you’re able to roughly understand how many generations it has successfully corrupted. On the other hand, God is all about forgiveness – up to a certain point. In order for Him to forgive one’s sins, one first needs to repent. There’s no such thing going on these days, let me tell you. So, naturally, God’s very mad at the rest of us for allowing this to happen. And then we’re surprised all of a sudden that after 8 years of Barack Obama’s presidency we see an escalation of violence that targets Republicans throughout America? It’s only logical that he’s punishing us this way. He’s letting us know it’s time to act before it’s too late and before future generations stop believing in God altogether,” Bachmann concluded.