Rep. Debbie Riddle Aims To “Ban Women Larger Than A C-Cup To Breastfeed In Public”
“Studies have shown that women with bigger breasts are not commonly associated with modest behavior”
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Sarah Huckabee: “The President Is Against The Politically Correct, So It’s Idiotic To Demand His Political Tweets To Be Correct”
Deputy White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders on Monday got into a heated exchange with reporter April Ryan after she asked about whether President Donald Trump is courting danger…
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Nugent: “I Don’t Hate Black People, They Just Have A Skin Disease That Affects Their Behavior”
While speaking this week with conservative radio host Joe Pags, National Rifle Association board member and musician Ted Nugent declared that anyone who doesn’t like him must hate America and…
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Rep. Tom Reed Suggests Increasing Military Budget “So The Poor Can Feel Safe And Stop Stealing Our Money For Their Health”
“Donald Trump is trying to help America, only unlike Barack Obama, he actually cares about what happens to all of its citizens and not just the poor”
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White House Admits Trump “Considering” Nugent’s Suggestion To “Force Every American To Take Pig Capsules As Response To Today’s UK Terror Attacks”
In the Islamic religion, pork and pork products are forbidden because the pig is considered an impure animal. Ted Nugent wrote in a Facebook post: “…The ironical part is that…
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Ted Cruz: “Southern States Should Build Their Own Nuclear Weapon To Protect Their Beliefs”
“I would draw the line at building the device, because killing fellow Americans, as deviant as they may be, is not right”
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Spicer: “POTUS Didn’t Misspell ‘Covfefe’ – As Head Of State, He Has The Legal Power To Decide How English Is Spelled”
White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer drew widespread laughter from reporters when he insisted that President Donald Trump’s infamous “covfefe” tweet was not a misspelling. After one reporter asked Spicer…
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WH Spokeswoman Hope Hicks: “President Trump Has A Magnetic Personality That Can Help U.S. To Find Precious Metals And Be Great Again”
The absence of communications director Michael Dubke might already be impacting the White House because the statements coming out of the press office seem a little off. In fact, some…
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Trump: “Only A Frenchie Can Dismiss Protocol And Try Stupid Macho Games”
France’s new president Emmanuel Macron described a white knuckle handshake in which he refused to relinquish his grip on U.S. president Donald Trump’s hand as “not innocent.” In an interview…
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Larry Klayman: “Michelle Obama’s Stripping Picture Proves She’s In A Lower Class Than Melania”
In a video posted on Wednesday, ultraconservative attorney Larry Klayman accused Barack Obama of trying to “undermine the Trump presidency” by going to Italy at the same time President Trump…
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Alabama Makes It Illegal To Remove Confederate Monuments: “Slavery Is Part of Our Great History And No One Can Decidedly Say It Should Be Banned”
The new law attempts to preserve history by making it illegal to remove monuments that have been in place for more than 40 years. The Alabama Memorial Preservation Act of…
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Trump Demands Americans To “Start Paying A Voluntary 35% Tax” On Imported Cars In Order To “Fight The Bad, Very Bad Germans”
President Donald Trump is ready to fight Germany in an auto battle according to Germany’s Der Spiegel. Trump got a chilly reception at the NATO summit in Belgium after attacking…
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Rep. Blake Farenthold: “DNC Hacking Was An Inside Job Orchestrated To Destroy Trump’s Presidency”
“I have a feeling that the government could suddenly start proclaiming that water is bad for us and that we need to switch over to beer, and the entire population of the country would probably start buying beer by the gallons”
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Trump Warns Arabs To Leave “Holy European Land Of Israel” Alone And “Go Back To Asia”
Israeli Ambassador to the United States Ron Dermer could hardly contain himself Monday during a meeting with Donald Trump after the president mistakenly implied Israel is not located in the…
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Flynn To Plead The 5th: “Unlike Me, Hillary’s Plead Was Unnecessary Because She Meant To Lie Like Women Always Do”
Former Trump National Security Adviser Michael Flynn plans to ignore the subpoena issued by the Senate Intelligence Committee and will cite his Fifth Amendment rights against self-incrimination. Senate Intelligence Committee…
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Hot Mic Catches Netanyahu’s Wife Reassuring Trump: “We And The Russians Love You No Matter What The Media Says”
Sara Netanyahu, the wife of Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, was caught on camera Monday trying to reassure President Donald Trump and his wife Melania that people “love” them despite…
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Trump: “The Importance Of Saying ‘Radical Islamic Terror’ Back Then Was Only Because We Had A Suspected Islamic President”
Following President Donald Trump’s speech on Islam Sunday morning, the normally bombastic president was hammered for refusing to use the expression “radical Islamic terrorism” – a phrase he previously criticized…
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Trump: “Unlike Obama, I Only Bowed Down Because The Golden Necklace Was Super Heavy”
President Donald Trump’s first trip overseas has – so far – gone seamlessly if one disregards the chaos he left at home with multiple bombshells dropped by the Washington Post…
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Paul Ryan: “All Tapes Are Irrelevant Because We Joke Around With Nonsense All The Time Precisely In Case Somebody Is Wiretapping”
House Speaker Paul Ryan seems spooked by a recording that reveals he asked Republican lawmakers not to discuss concerns that then-candidate Donald Trump might have been paid off by Vladimir…
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Trump Threatens To Cancel Visit To Israel Because “The McDonald’s There Doesn’t Have A Bacon Cheese Big Mac”
President Donald Trump eats like a 6-foot, 240-pound petulant child – if that irritable youngster had the ability to push a button and make a lackey fetch a Coke. He’s…
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Roger Stone Blames Obama For The Possibility Of Trump Having Alzheimer’s Because “His Attacks On The President Caused Severe Stress”
The whispers are growing louder that President Donald Trump may be suffering some sort of mental decline and cognitive impairment – and his longtime pal Roger Stone thinks it’s a…
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Ann Coulter: “Trump Is A Complete Nightmare, But We’re Not Allowed To Question God’s Choices”
Right-wing polemicist Ann Coulter, who last year authored a pro-Trump book called In Trump We Trust, is very unhappy about the early days of his presidency. In an interview with…
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Trump’s Top Scientist Pick: “Scientists Are Just Dumb Regular People That Think Dinosaurs Existed And The Earth Is Getting Warmer”
The research section of the USDA studies everything from nutrition to climate change, and according to the 2008 Farm Bill the “chief scientist” is supposed to be the leader “among…
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Bakker Calls Trump To Use His Legal Power And Cancel SNL Because “They’re Hurting God By Insulting Our President”
During “The Jim Bakker Show” on Thursday, televangelist Jim Bakker talked about tensions and divisions, which he connected to the First Horseman of the Apocalypse. He pointed out that a…
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