Ted Nugent Post-Virginia Shooting: “I Have Seen The Light – We Must Have More Guns”

Singer Ted Nugent claims that he has seen the light and will stop using toxic rhetoric to attack Democrats. In a Thursday interview with 77WABC Radio, Nugent swore that he has “reevaluated” his language and would refrain from saying “anything that can be interpreted as condoning or referencing violence.” “At the tender age of 69, my wife has convinced me I just…

Trump’s Lawyer Said President Made A Mistake By Firing Comey Because “As The Commander In Chief, He Could Arrested And Jailed Him Forever”

President Trump’s personal lawyer offered a contradictory and partially inaccurate defense of his client after James Comey’s testimony on Thursday, accusing the former FBI director of lying under oath before Congress and suggesting he should be criminally investigated for sharing memos he drafted about his private conversations with Trump. Mark Kasowitz, a Manhattan-based corporate attorney and longtime legal fixer for Trump, began…

Nugent: “I Don’t Hate Black People, They Just Have A Skin Disease That Affects Their Behavior”

While speaking this week with conservative radio host Joe Pags, National Rifle Association board member and musician Ted Nugent declared that anyone who doesn’t like him must hate America and everything the country stands for. “There’s nothing more anti-American than the freaks that hate me,” Nugent said, after going on a rant against Hillary Clinton and “Bernie Mao Zedong Sanders.” “As the…

White House Admits Trump “Considering” Nugent’s Suggestion To “Force Every American To Take Pig Capsules As Response To Today’s UK Terror Attacks”

In the Islamic religion, pork and pork products are forbidden because the pig is considered an impure animal. Ted Nugent wrote in a Facebook post: “…The ironical part is that when a suicide bomber blows himself up his body parts are impregnated with gelatin and glycerin from the explosive. Both gelatin and glycerin are manufactured from pigs worldwide. Ergo, they will never…

WH Spokeswoman Hope Hicks: “President Trump Has A Magnetic Personality That Can Help U.S. To Find Precious Metals And Be Great Again”

The absence of communications director Michael Dubke might already be impacting the White House because the statements coming out of the press office seem a little off. In fact, some online critics are mocking a newly released statement as a “parody” that looks like something President Donald Trump would write about himself. “President Trump has a magnetic personality and exudes positive energy,…

Alabama Makes It Illegal To Remove Confederate Monuments: “Slavery Is Part of Our Great History And No One Can Decidedly Say It Should Be Banned”

The new law attempts to preserve history by making it illegal to remove monuments that have been in place for more than 40 years. The Alabama Memorial Preservation Act of 2017, signed into law Wednesday by Alabama Gov. Kay Ivey (R), protects historical Confederate monuments which have come under fire in recent weeks by Democratic politicians. The new legislation prohibits “the relocation,…

Trump Demands Americans To “Start Paying A Voluntary 35% Tax” On Imported Cars In Order To “Fight The Bad, Very Bad Germans”

President Donald Trump is ready to fight Germany in an auto battle according to Germany’s Der Spiegel. Trump got a chilly reception at the NATO summit in Belgium after attacking fellow members. But he was caught pledging a battle with German automakers as part of his anger with “back dues” he feels the country owes to NATO. As CNN’s Jake Tapper noted…

Flynn To Plead The 5th: “Unlike Me, Hillary’s Plead Was Unnecessary Because She Meant To Lie Like Women Always Do”

Former Trump National Security Adviser Michael Flynn plans to ignore the subpoena issued by the Senate Intelligence Committee and will cite his Fifth Amendment rights against self-incrimination. Senate Intelligence Committee Chairman Richard Burr (R-NC) said last week that Flynn had not yet complied with the Senate’s subpoena, and added that he didn’t expect Flynn to agree to testify under oath. Flynn asked…