NewsLo
  • Today’s Headlines
  • Featured
  • US
  • Politics
  • World
  • Media
  • Sports
  • Privacy Policy
Subscribe
NewsLo
NewsLo
  • Home
  • Business
    • Accounting
    • Advertising
    • Branding
    • Career
    • Customer Service
    • Cyber Security
    • Entrepreneur
    • Jobs
    • Management
    • Marketing
    • Non Profit
    • Search Engine Optimization
    • Sales
    • Web Design
  • Finance
    • Banking
    • Bankruptcy
    • Budgeting
    • Credit
    • Debt
    • Estate Wills & Trusts
    • Home Improvements
    • Law
    • Loans
    • Personal Finance
    • Taxes
    • Shopping
  • Investment
    • Crypto Currency
    • Gold & Silver
    • Hard Assets
    • Real Estate
    • Retirement
    • Stocks & Bonds
    • Trading
  • Real Estate
    • Buying
    • Selling
    • Commercial Construction
    • Construction Law
    • Home Improvement
    • Loans
    • Property Management
    • Real Estate Laws
    • Rental Property
  • Insurance
    • Auto Insurance
    • Commercial Real Estate Insurance
    • Crop Insurance
    • Dental Insurance
    • Disability Insurance
    • Health Insurance
    • Home Owners Insurance
    • Identity Theft Protection
    • Insurance Law
    • Investment Insurance
  • Contact Us
  • Politics

Dick Cheney Celebrates Opening of the Dick Cheney Presidential Library

  • May 1, 2013
  • News Lo
Dick Cheney
(Photo Credit: Wikimedia Commons)
Total
0
Shares
0
0
0

UNDISCLOSED LOCATION — Just days after the public opening of the George W. Bush Presidential Library in Dallas, Dick Cheney and a cadre of close advisors celebrated the opening of the Dick Cheney Presidential Library today at an undisclosed location built into a mountain somewhere deep in the Rockies.

Speaking to an assembly of hand-picked reporters who were blindfolded for their trip to the secret locale, Cheney expressed his desire to see the Library serve as a testament to the decisions he made while running the country as Vice-President from 2001-2009.  “While W is getting more of the attention, it is fitting that we meet here today, away from prying eyes, to celebrate all that we were able to accomplish behind closed doors.”

Dignitaries were treated to a tour of a replica of the office where Cheney & Power Company CEO’s set the country’s energy policy in the Spring of 2001, as well as a black ops prison that Cheney helped authorize, resulting in the torture of an unknown number of people.  The event reportedly went over well.  “Really took me back to the good ol’ days,” said Scooter Libby, who was convicted of perjury and obstruction of justice while working for the Vice President.  “Worth breaking the law over,” he added with a smile.

To commemorate the occasion, each attendee was given a special Cheney Library pin that will track their movements and record their every conversation.

The Library’s other attractions include a booth where visitors can stick their hand into a George W. Bush puppet and make it say what they want, toilets & urinals lined with copies of the Bill of Rights, and the Shoot-A-Friend-in-The-Face Range.

Cheney said he hopes the Library will stand as a testament to his belief that “a few dedicated people can really change the world.”

Total
0
Shares
Share 0
Tweet 0
Pin it 0
Related Topics
  • Dick Cheney
  • Dick Cheney President
  • Dick Cheney ran the country
  • news humor and satire
  • Satire
Avatar of News Lo
News Lo

Welcome to Newslo! Our team of dedicated authors strives to deliver the latest and most important info on finance while infusing a dose of our own style to give you a unique experience. Whether you're looking for in-depth discussions on investments or solid finance tips, we have something for everyone. Our goal is to deliver you the best possible content. So, keep reading our articles and give us your feedback!

Previous Article
  • New York

In Citi Bikes, New Yorkers Finally Have Another Way to Get Hit by Cars

  • May 1, 2013
  • News Lo
View Post
Next Article
  • Media

Special Report: Tamerlan Tsarnaev Wore Tighty-Whiteys, Had Mole on Left Ankle

  • May 1, 2013
  • News Lo
View Post
1 comment
  1. Avatar of Irwin B. Platzner Irwin B. Platzner says:
    May 1, 2013 at 11:49 am

    Love the satire!!! 🙂 Sharing on The Platzner Post Facebook, and Twitter

Comments are closed.

NewsLo
  • Today’s Headlines
  • Featured
  • US
  • Politics
  • World
  • Media
  • Sports
  • Privacy Policy
Navigating the world of finance, one step at a time.

Input your search keywords and press Enter.