Maine Gov. Paul LePage (R) followed up recent complaints about out-of-state drug dealers impregnating “white girls” by suggesting recently that some drug offenses should be punished with public executions. “I think these people – there’s nothing good enough for these people,” he opined. “I think four years is not good enough, we’ve got to go to 20 years, we’ve got to keep them here until they die.” Although the hosts of the show attempted to conclude the interview, the governor was not done. “What I think we ought to do is bring the guillotine back,” LePage interrupted. “We could have public executions, and we could even have which hole it falls in.”

But when the hosts asked him whether drug dealers should be allowed to choose who gets to go to the guillotine first, white offenders or black, LePage acted surprised: “What do you mean, ‘should they be allowed to choose?’ Did I stutter? I don’t think I did. At no point during this interview did I say that we would use these public executions to make an example out of white drug traffickers. No, this is just for black men. They’re the ones we need to be making an example of – an example that will show others like them what’s going to happen if they decide to come to Maine to sell drugs and get our daughters pregnant.”

“And honestly,” the governor continued, “I’m appalled that interracial relationships have become widespread in this country. I mean, I can’t imagine being a woman and liking, kissing, or least of all, making love to a black man. First of all, their B.O. is off the charts, second, I know most women have a thing for bad boys, and African-Americans are bad to the bone from the moment they’re born till the moment they go six feet under the ground, but they’re another race. They’re good for manual labor and infantry troops, but to mix with them? Moreover, we have women these days who are bewitched by black men into having interracial children with them, which are abominations. I’m telling you the state of things in America right now is close to Apocalypse.”

He concluded: “That’s why we need to set things right starting right now, and we need to get it through white girls’ heads that getting knocked up by black men only means raising your interracial kid on welfare and without the father. That’s a lifetime of torment and hardships for a five-minute pleasure ride, and that’s if they’re lucky. What I’m trying to say is – it’s just not worth it, so you better go hump a white bum. You’ll do similarly on finances and upbringing, but at least you’ll be stuck with a white baby, which is a definite plus. But, in order to get to all of that, we need to start making an example of black men, and we need to start doing it now. They’re sneaky – if they smell what’s coming, they’re all going to run back to Africa, and then we won’t be able to recognize them among the natives. This is a time to act fast, not sit idly by and watch more and more half-breed babies saturating our country.”