NewsLo
  • Today’s Headlines
  • Featured
  • US
  • Politics
  • World
  • Media
  • Sports
  • Privacy Policy
Subscribe
NewsLo
NewsLo
  • Home
  • Business
    • Accounting
    • Advertising
    • Branding
    • Career
    • Customer Service
    • Cyber Security
    • Entrepreneur
    • Jobs
    • Management
    • Marketing
    • Non Profit
    • Search Engine Optimization
    • Sales
    • Web Design
  • Finance
    • Banking
    • Bankruptcy
    • Budgeting
    • Credit
    • Debt
    • Estate Wills & Trusts
    • Home Improvements
    • Law
    • Loans
    • Personal Finance
    • Taxes
    • Shopping
  • Investment
    • Crypto Currency
    • Gold & Silver
    • Hard Assets
    • Real Estate
    • Retirement
    • Stocks & Bonds
    • Trading
  • Real Estate
    • Buying
    • Selling
    • Commercial Construction
    • Construction Law
    • Home Improvement
    • Loans
    • Property Management
    • Real Estate Laws
    • Rental Property
  • Insurance
    • Auto Insurance
    • Commercial Real Estate Insurance
    • Crop Insurance
    • Dental Insurance
    • Disability Insurance
    • Health Insurance
    • Home Owners Insurance
    • Identity Theft Protection
    • Insurance Law
    • Investment Insurance
  • Contact Us
  • Sports

Locked-Out NHL Players Turn to Curling

  • December 13, 2012
  • News Lo
curling--shutterstock
(Photo Credit: Shutterstock)

BOSTON — The National Hockey League’s recent announcement canceling all NHL games through December 30 has forced a number of professional hockey players to turn to the sport of curling to make a living.

“There’s something about a biter on swingy ice in an extra end that gets my juices going!” Said San Jose Sharks left wing Frazer McLaren, a closet curling enthusiast now out in the open. “This lock-out has been a God-send.”

In the past few months, more and more NHL regulars have found their true calling between the hog line and the backline. A recent bonspiel featured Anaheim Ducks right wing Andrew Gordon sweeping ice as Montreal Canadiens center Andrea Engqvist delivered a stone under the watchful eye of Calgary Flames goalie Leland Irving, acting as skip.

“There’s a majesty to curling you just don’t get in the NHL,” said Minnesota Wild right wing Jed Ortmeyer. “When a double takeout flips the balance of power, it’s too beautiful for words. What has hockey got, anyway? A slapshot? Please.”

The influx of professional hockey players into the sport has had both positive and negative consequences. “All the attention we’ve been getting lately has been great for business, no doubt,” said World Curling Federation President Kate Caithness, pointing to new sponsorship deals with Under Armour, ThermaCare, and Yuengling Brewery. “But some of our new curlers play a more contact-oriented game than we’re used to.”

A recent altercation between New York Rangers defensive player Stu Bickel and Colorado Avalanche left wing Cody McLeod has the curling world stunned. The incident arose after Bickel delivered a heavy hammer in the third end that bounced off the bumper and crashed into McLeod’s foot, shocking the dozens of curling fans in attendance.

“I think Stu forgot we weren’t wearing helmets when he hit Cody over the head with the stone,” said Philadelphia Flyers center Maxime Talbot who witnessed the incident. “I’d never actually seen brains on the ice before, but props to Cody for getting right back up and calling a burned stone before passing out and being rushed to the hospital.”

Related Topics
  • Locked out nhl players
  • Newslo sports satire and political humor
  • NHL Lockout
  • NHL Lockouts effects
  • NHL Players and curling
  • NHL Players during lock-outw
  • players and the NHL
  • sports satire and curling
  • what are NHL players doing during lockout?
Avatar of News Lo
News Lo

Previous Article
  • US

Soup Kitchens Prepare to Accommodate Increased Demand for College Recommendation Letters

  • December 13, 2012
  • News Lo
View Post
Next Article
  • Politics

Newslo Scoops Interviews with 2024 Presidential Candidates

  • December 13, 2012
  • News Lo
View Post
NewsLo
  • Today’s Headlines
  • Featured
  • US
  • Politics
  • World
  • Media
  • Sports
  • Privacy Policy
Navigating the world of finance, one step at a time.

Input your search keywords and press Enter.