Michele Bachmann’s Top 15 One-Liners

1.  “Carbon dioxide is portrayed as harmful. But there isn’t even one study that can be produced that shows that carbon dioxide is a harmful gas.” -Rep. Michele Bachmann, April, 2009

2. “But we also know that the very founders that wrote those documents worked tirelessly until slavery was no more in the United States.”

(Photo Credit: Christopher Halloran/Shutterstock/QuickMeme)
(Photo Credit: Christopher Halloran/Shutterstock/QuickMeme)

3. ”This cannot pass. What we have to do today is make a covenant, to slit our wrists, be blood brothers on this thing. This will not pass. We will do whatever it takes to make sure this doesn’t pass.”

4. “What I love about New Hampshire and what we have in common is our extreme love of liberty…You’re the state where the shot heard round the world in Lexington and Concord.

5. “Lady Liberty and Sarah Palin are lit by the same torch.”

6. I find it interesting that it was back in the 1970s that the swine flu broke out under another, then under another Democrat president, Jimmy Carter. I’m not blaming this on President Obama, I just think it’s an interesting coincidence.”

7. “If we took away the minimum wage — if conceivably it was gone — we could potentially virtually wipe out unemployment completely because we would be able to offer jobs at whatever level.”

8. “I Haven’t Had A Gaffe”

9. “Our K-12 public school system, of which ninety per cent of all youth are in the public school system, they will be required to learn that homosexuality is normal, equal and perhaps you should try it. And that will occur immediately, that all schools will begin teaching homosexuality.”

10. “(Same-sex marriage) is probably the biggest issue that will impact our state and our nation in the last, at least, thirty years. I am not understating that.”

11. “Normalization [of gayness] through desensitization. Very effective way to do this with a bunch of second graders is take a picture of ‘The Lion King for instance, and a teacher might say, ‘Do you know that the music for this movie was written by a gay man?’ The message is: ‘I’m better at what I do, because I’m gay.'”

12. “I don’t think that it has been established yet as a fact that global warming is the issue of the day . . . one thing that we need to do is look at the science.”

13. “Michael Steele! You be da man! You be da man.”

14. “Why should I go and do something like that? But the Lord says, ‘Be submissive wives; you are to be submissive to your husbands.”

15. “I don’t know how much God has to do to get the attention of the politicians. We’ve had an earthquake; we’ve had a hurricane. He said, ‘Are you going to start listening to me here?’ Listen to the American people because the American people are roaring right now. They know government is on a morbid obesity diet and we’ve got to rein in the spending.”

BONUS: “I just take the Bible for what it is, I guess, and recognize that I am not a scientist, not trained to be a scientist. I’m not a deep thinker on all of this. I wish I was. I wish I was more knowledgeable, but I’m not a scientist.”

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  • Avatar of Irwin B. Platzner
    Irwin B. Platzner
    Posted May 29, 2013 at 4:00 pm 0Likes

    Great satire!!! 🙂 Sharing on The Platzner Post Facebook facebook.com/ThePlatznerPost , and Twitter https://twitter.com/ThePlatznerPost

  • Avatar of Paul
    Posted May 29, 2013 at 5:27 pm 0Likes

    Unfortunately it’s not satire. It’s what this MORON actually said. Comedians from all over the USA are crying tonight.

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