Moms of America Furious Over Lil Wayne’s Glorification of Epilepsy

LOS ANGELES — Anti-Lil Wayne rallies have been sprouting up across the country due to what many mothers feel is the rapper’s tacit support of epilepsy. Signs that read “School Not Seizures” and “Hugs Over Strokes” have been spotted in the days since Lil Wayne grabbed headlines with his hospitalization.

“What Wayne fails to understand is that his music is not just for people who are in the hospital anymore,” said Kristin Smith, CEO of the Mothers Against Degenerate Entertainment, “Lil Wayne is now a mainstream cultural icon, and he has a responsibility to contextualize epilepsy so America’s youth don’t try to follow in his footsteps.”

While the rapper has not come out and endorsed epilepsy, many feel that by not explicitly stating his anti-seizure position while being hospitalized, he was giving the medical condition his approval.

No data supports the notion that when popular music stars have seizures it spawns more seizures in the general public, but Smith believes the numbers are misleading, “it’s just like violent video games and gun violence or gangsta rap and suburban street crime. As mothers we don’t need statistics, we just need our maternal instincts.”

Lil Wayne’s camp appears completely confused by the media hoopla. “Do they not want me to be me?” inquired a clearly confounded Wayne. “I had seizures, do they want me to pretended something else happens so their kids will be on the honor roll? How does that make any sense? How are these things related?” Wayne said while sipping on a Styrofoam cup filled with a potent smelling purple drink.