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Obama Announces Tax Credit for Americans

  • August 20, 2013
  • News Lo
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WASHINGTON — Following the unilateral suspension of Obamacare’s employer mandate and patients’ out-of-pocket cost caps, President Obama announced today that one-time tax credits will be offered to all citizens who voluntarily waive their rights to civil liberties promised by the Bill of Rights.

“Obviously it would be ideal that all citizens are protected by the Bill of Rights,” read an official White House press release. “However, at the present moment, this administration believes that it would be impossible to fairly and effectively offer civil liberties to all Americans, and will be offering tax credits to those who voluntarily opt-out of their constitutionally guaranteed freedoms.”

According to the plan, the tax credit would be a one-time payment of $25,000 for a full renunciation of the protections of the Bill of Rights, or two payments of $12,500 for fiscal years 2013 and 2014.

“At the present time there is no plan in place to refund or rescind one’s credit,” a White House spokesperson said today. “For the time being, we will have to assume that waiving your civil liberties would be permanent.”

“Given the fact that the director of the NSA was caught lying to Congress about recording phone and internet activity of millions of Americans, in addition to the hundreds of Obamacare waivers granted to Congressmen and their staffers, selected businesses, unions, and other special interests, we felt that civil liberties and impartial enforcement of the law was unduly hindering the White House’s efforts to govern effectively. President Obama is investing in the future of millions of Americans while simultaneously allowing his administration to do away with the pretense of democracy and rule of law.”

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Related Topics
  • news humor and satire
  • Obama
  • Obama Announces credit
  • Obama Taxes
  • taxing america
  • Taxing the rich
  • who to tax
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2 comments
  1. Mike Gawin says:
    October 23, 2014 at 11:03 pm

    Uh, hello.. Hit the “Show the facts” button. This is a satire article. There are many like it, but this is the one that got you. Any time you are alarmed by an article you read on line CHECK THE FACTS before letting it get to you. Satire sites are the new “PLAGUE” on the internet. There are more satire (bogus news) sites now than real news sites.

  2. Candace L. Miller says:
    October 23, 2014 at 11:03 pm

    One of the founding fathers said that, he who would give up liberty for a little bit of security deserves neither. Also, BO can’t do that. He cannot make laws, neither is it legal for him to take anyone’s rights away. Impeach him now! He is a tyrannist at the very least.

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