ANCHORAGE, Alaska — Former Vice Presidential candidate and human caricature of misinformation Sarah Palin has confirmed the completion of a new reality show in which she travels across the heart of the United States with Representative Michele Bachmann, who takes on the roles of foolhardy sidekick and quirky racist. The program, which will air on FOX this October, will be named “Riding Lady Liberty with Sarah and Michele.”
Drawing inspiration from what Palin called “groundbreaking television and an inspiration to anyone who’s been affected by mental disability,” the show models itself heavily on 2003’s “The Simple Life,” which starred Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie on their journey to connect to the everyman and halt – if not completely reverse – the forward progression of mankind.
Over the course of 24 days, Palin and Bachmann visited 15 cities and towns that epitomize the American dream. They attempted to “reconnect with the heart of what makes this country so darn special,” as Palin told Newslo. The already controversial opening credits make no question of the show’s themes. Ted Nugent’s all-gunshot interpretation of the classic “This Land is Your Land” accompanies scenes of Palin and Bachmann riding sidesaddle atop galloping migrant workers, all while iconic American landscapes rotate along the backdrop.
“Oh, we have fun,” said Bachmann at a recent press conference. “It’s not every day that you get to travel around the country with one of your best girlfriends, which is why I had to settle for Sarah,” she said through chuckles before breaking down into silent tears.
The Tea Party’s golden girls waste no time in their first episode, which finds Palin and Bachmann taking cues from programs like “Extreme Home Makeover” as they surprise a local congregation in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, with a totally remodeled house of worship, complete with an entirely new set of bibles. The leaders of the congregation were allowed confessional-style time with the camera to express their gratitude to the traveling politicians.
“Everyone was very, very angry and upset,” said Muhammad Akbari, Imam of the local mosque that had been unexpectedly renovated under cover of darkness. “None of the new designs align with our beliefs,” he added, “and the suckling pig roast they held in the parking lot to celebrate was probably the most traumatizing part of the day.”
The second half of the episode finds Palin and Bachmann meeting the American people face to face as they travel around government housing projects in Chicago and hand out personally compiled care packages door to door.
Pending the settlement of a growing number of lawsuits by individuals and civil rights groups, the show will air on Fox in the time slot directly following Jeff Foxworthy’s “Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader.” When questioned about any intended irony in the lineup, Fox declined to comment.