Pat Robertson Fears Allowing Women Access to Front-lines Will Threaten Homeland Inequality

WASHINGTON — Former Southern Baptist minister and current chairman of the Christian Broadcasting Network, Marion Gordon Robertson, who prefers to go by the masculine nickname “Pat” to differentiate himself from the weaker sex, recently spoke out about the new military changes and their potential ramifications in the U.S.

“It starts with equal opportunity to serve in front-line positions, but what happens when these women come back from war? Then they’ll begin asking for equal wages and then equal representation in government – the equality will never stop!”

Mixed responses have followed the new directive, signed Thursday by chairman of the Joints Chiefs of Staff Gen. Martin Dempsey and Defense Secretary Leon Panetta, which lifts the 1994 ban on women in combat from serving in front-line posts.

While many praise the directive for opening front-line posts and opportunities for career advancement to the roughly 200,000 women serving in the active-duty military, some conservatives feel that frontline equality is just the tip of the iceberg.

Following this sentiment, Robertson has announced intentions to begin drafting new legislature to counteract the adverse affects of equality. Along with repealing the 19th Amendment, the “Jill Crow Laws” would attempt to bring women back from the battlefield and into the kitchen.

“Men and women are still going to be able to use the same bathroom,” Robertson assured the public. “But women will be required to clean it afterward.”