Texas Gun Store Refuses to Sell Firearms to Piers Morgan

DALLAS — No longer affiliated with CNN, Piers Morgan is exercising his rights as a free agent. Purchasing a firearm is not among those rights, according to the owner of a local gun shop.

“Almost as soon as he changed his station, Piers seemed to change his stance” on gun control, claimed Marty Williams of Longhorn Guns & Ammo.

“I wasn’t fooled by that turncoat. And I certainly wasn’t going to sell him a gun.” Williams went on to explain that Morgan entered the shop right before closing, looking slightly disheveled, or “British-like,” in Williams’ terms.

“He immediately demanded to see a Pancor Jackhammer,” said Williams, referring to the 12-gauge automatic shotgun. “As if he knew how to fire anything but ignorant verbal buckshot.”

Both parties agree that the former talk show host was seeking assistance from the shop owner. What remains uncertain is the type of help Morgan sought.

“My car broke down,” said Morgan. “I only wanted to see if the owner had a jack.”

Regardless of intent, the British citizen’s behavior put Williams on high alert. “Here I had a vocal critic of American gun rights in my store—either shooting an undercover investigation for his MSNBC demo reel or looking to buy a gun to take revenge on his previous employers.”

Williams told Morgan in no uncertain terms to leave his store and “return home” to Britain, echoing a petition drive instigated by gun advocate Alex Jones. The petition to deport Morgan received over 100,000 signatures and an official response from the White House.

“Where’d he get the right to waltz in here and tell me what he thinks about gun violence in America—or that hazardous pothole a mile back?” asked Williams.

By Morgan’s own admission, gun advocates had a reason to fear him. “I wouldn’t crack the champagne open too quickly though, @NRA – I haven’t finished with you lot yet,” tweeted Morgan after announcing that he had parted ways with CNN.

Indeed, Morgan may be best known with American audiences for his televised debate on gun control with Jones. Morgan used the show he inherited from CNN’s Larry King to suggest “a nationwide ban on military-style semi-automatic assault weapons and high capacity magazines,” in addition to closing loopholes allowing for sales at guns shows without background checks.

“Look, I am a British guy debating American cultural issues, including guns, which has been very polarizing, and there is no doubt that there are many in the audience who are tired of me banging on about it,” said Morgan.

He added, “If there’s one things Americans hate more than gun control, it’s reasoned debate. But there’s nothing to prevent me from going elsewhere.”

Morgan was spotted later that same day in the hunting section of an area Walmart. Newlso has been unable to confirm the report that he requested a job application.

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