Proponents of Second Amendment Denounce First Amendment

WASHINGTON – Following the tragic massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary School, proponents of Second Amendment Rights claim to have found the true cause of the recent rash of mass shootings in America: the First Amendment.

At a speech earlier this week, NRA executive vice president Wayne LaPierre continued his crusade against the American media, arguing that “First Amendment abuses” were making young men across the country lash out.

“Things like full frontal nudity in movies, foul-mouthed rap music, and pretentious works of modern art are clearly the true culprits here, driving otherwise reasonable, sane individuals to commit acts of unspeakable terror,” said Wayne LaPierre. “Not the easily accessible automatic weapons that are capable of causing multiple deaths in mere seconds.”

LaPierre then argued that putting limits on the First Amendment was imperative moving forward.

“It’s becoming increasingly clear that the freedom of speech is running amok, and the First Amendment must be limited to protect American lives,” said LaPierre, adding that he wasn’t a huge fan of the Sixteenth, Eighteenth, or Twenty-Fifth Amendments either.

Rock guitarist and gun ownership rights advocate Ted Nugent echoed LaPierre’s sentiments in an interview on CNN’s Piers Morgan Tonight.

“The First Amendment must have limits. The media’s portrayal of violence have become more and more extreme. As a result, our values as a society are degrading, leading to these terrible tragedies,” said Nugent. “And if you disagree, you can suck on my machine gun.”