Donald Trump held a campaign rally on Saturday at Regent University, the Christian College founded by Pat Robertson. Since Robertson was a vocal supporter of the GOP nominee, it was no surprise to see him deliver some short remarks to open the rally. The televangelist recounted meeting Trump for the first time years ago while attending an Evander Holyfield fight. At the time, Trump was facing financial difficulties, but assured Robertson that he would recover, which he did. That prompted Robertson to send a warning to the professional bookies in Las Vegas.
“I want you to think real careful about what you’re going to do when time comes,” Robertson warned the bookies in his address. “I know how the odds work and I know how profits are made, but there is one very important thing you should keep in mind when it comes to Donald Trump. And that’s the fact that we’re talking here about a self-made billionaire, someone who’s faced catastrophic odds on multiple occasions and has come out on top each and every time. And any wise bookie would take that fact into consideration.”
He continued, “At this point and partly because we’re at this beautiful location with all these students here listening to what we have to say, I’d like to draw a parallel between betting against Donald Trump winning the presidency and something that’s probably familiar to these and all other students throughout the country, though predominantly male ones. And that’s a wet t-shirt contest: you never ever bet on the flat-chested girl at a wet t-shirt contest. And I’m bringing this up now because that’s exactly what it would be like to bet on Donald Trump losing the election. It leads to doom.”
“I also apologize to the ladies here present as well as all others who might be listening, but I just had to make a memorable example. And if you know your fellow male students, there’s hardly a better example to be made than referencing something as picturesque as a bunch of good looking women being drenched with bucket loads of water while not wearing any bras,” the televangelist attempted to sound less disgusting, as if that was possible at this point. “But I think you’ll agree with me when I say that the example I made gets the job done, to say the least.”
Robertson also added that “whoever wants to make good money in November” should go down to the nearest bookie and put money down on Donald Trump winning the presidential election. “Because that’s what natural-born winners do, they don’t make excuses. And in case nobody has noticed, Donald Trump is a natural-born winner. That’s why betting against the self-made businessman would be like betting on the only flat-chested girl at a wet t-shirt contest. Everybody can see the outcome in both situations; but it’s the quickest ones that make the biggest profit,” he concluded.