Putin On Russian Bombers In Mexican Gulf: “Relax, I’m Just Checking Out Florida For Vacation”

“While the recent APEC summit held in the Chinese capital saw Russian President Vladimir Putin taking a public relations win, the situation between him and his American counterpart, Barrack Obama, might not be that different from what happened in Beijing.

“Namely, President Putin has recently authorized launching a glitzy global web broadcast and radio network in order to spread Moscow’s word, in addition to authorizing Russian bomber flights in the Gulf of Mexico.

““Never before in history has Russia flown actual bomber patrols over the Gulf of Mexico, including during the Cold War”, said a senior US military official to Newslo.

“Even though Putin briefly met Obama at the Asian summit in Beijing this week, the recent developments in the Gulf of Mexico come at a time when the tensions between Russia and the US are growing without precedent.

The Russian President, as usual, has his own characteristic point of view on the matter: “the Russian Federation answers to no one and what we do with our army is our business, and our business alone.”

Putin said exclusively to Newslo: “there’s no reason for the US government to fear Russian bombers in the Gulf of Mexico. If you must know, I was scouting for a location for my next vacation, and I’m told Florida’s lovely pretty much all year-round. So, I figured, if I’m there, why not pop down to Cuba and see what they’ve done with the place? I’m also told Gitmo is a real tourist attraction; it would be a real shame to miss it.”

He also added: “but, as I understand, Florida gets a lot of sun. I’m a bit worried about that, with my fair complexion and all…oh well, I guess I’ll just have to pack a ton of sun screen, right?”