NewsLo
NewsLo
  • Home
  • Business
    • Accounting
    • Advertising
    • Branding
    • Career
    • Cyber Security
    • Entrepreneur
    • Jobs
    • Management
    • Marketing
    • Non Profit
    • Sales
    • Search Engine Optimization
    • Web Design
  • Finance
    • Banking
    • Bankruptcy
    • Budgeting
    • Credit
    • Debt
    • Estate Wills & Trusts
    • Home Improvements
    • Law
    • Loans
    • Personal Finance
    • Taxes
    • Shopping
  • Investment
    • Crypto Currency
    • Gold & Silver
    • Hard Assets
    • Real Estate
    • Retirement
    • Stocks & Bonds
    • Trading
  • Real Estate
    • Buying
    • Selling
    • Commercial Construction
    • Construction Law
    • Home Improvement
    • Loans
    • Property Management
    • Real Estate Laws
    • Rental Property
  • Insurance
    • Auto Insurance
    • Commercial Real Estate Insurance
    • Crop Insurance
    • Dental Insurance
    • Disability Insurance
    • Health Insurance
    • Home Owners Insurance
    • Identity Theft Protection
    • Insurance Law
    • Investment Insurance
    • Life Insurance
    • Pet Insurance
    • Renters Insurance
  • Contact Us
  • Today's Headlines
  • US

S. D. Native American Tribe Celebrates Columbus Day with Home Invasions

  • October 14, 2013
  • NewsLo
  • No comments
  • 2 minute read
Total
0
Shares
0
0
0

SIOUX FALLS, S.D. — A group of South Dakota Native Americans are using this Columbus Day to do some colonizing of their own.

Members of the Oglala Sioux Tribe of the Pine Ridge Reservation, a subtribe of the Great Sioux Nation, are celebrating Columbus Day by leaving the reservation to “discover and explore” the homes of strangers and declare them their own.

23 years ago, the South Dakota legislature unanimously passed legislation to change the state’s Columbus Day holiday to Native American Day, but many Oglala Sioux believe the change was made only to “assuage the white man’s guilt.”

“It’s nice to have a holiday and all, but I’d rather have my continent back,” said Ehawee, an Oglala Sioux high school student. “Besides, Thanksgiving is like a month away, and then it’s all about you guys again.”

Ehawee said that her family is one of hundreds of Oglala Sioux families who would use Monday’s Native American Day to go from home to home in Sioux Fall’s rich suburbs until they find one that they like. “Then the Oglala will make new homes. Maybe we’ll call our new land Canada,” said Ehawee’s father, Teetonka.

Teetonka admitted that taking over the homes of stranger’s could be dangerous, especially considering that South Dakota has the seventh-largest population of gun owners in the United States. “But who do you think owns half of those guns? That’s right. My people had to get with the times.”

Teetonka promised to use force “only if he doesn’t feel like negotiating” and said that he would “allow the home’s family to make new living arrangements in the back yard, or maybe in the basement, if they have one. That way they can still have a place to live.”

Bernie Shot With Arrow, a Tribal Council Representative from the Pine Ridge Reservation’s Medicine Root District, said he plans to “let it all go” when his family finds their new home. “Once we kick everybody out, I’m going to kick my shoes off, put my feet up on the couch, and live out my days like a white man.”

“We’re bringing our own blankets, though, just to be safe,” added Shot With Arrow.

Sioux Falls Chief of Police Doug Barthel said authorities are aware of “rumors about the Oglagla Sioux’s plan to invade homes,” but was adamant that locals need not feel threatened. “We’re under the impression that this is all just some sort of PR stunt, but just in case it’s not, the overwhelming number of good white people that live in the area should be enough to stamp out any threat of the native peoples.”

When asked if he was prepared to be arrested for trespassing and possible assault, Shot With Arrow answered firmly that he is “not afraid.”

“In fact, we’ll invite them in for a feast and see if things shake out differently this time.”

Total
0
Shares
Share 0
Tweet 0
Pin it 0
Related Topics
  • Columbus Day
  • Columbus Day in America
  • Columbus Days
  • Native American Tribe
  • news humor and satire
  • Sioux Falls tride
NewsLo

Previous Article
Republican Senators Hesitate to Betray Too Much Concern for Citizens 1
  • Politics
  • Today's Headlines

Republican Senators Hesitate to Betray Too Much Concern for Citizens

  • October 14, 2013
  • NewsLo
View Post
Next Article
Report: Obamacare Websites Slowed by Patriotic Virus 2
  • Today's Headlines
  • US

Report: Obamacare Websites Slowed by Patriotic Virus

  • October 14, 2013
  • NewsLo
View Post
You May Also Like
best franchises to own
View Post
  • US

5 of the Most Lucrative & Best Franchises to Own in 2020

  • NewsLo
  • March 16, 2020
ted cruz religion refugees
View Post
  • Featured
  • Politics
  • US
  • US-Feature

Ted Cruz News: “Helping Texans Is Not Like Helping New Orleans, Hurricane Sandy Was Righteous”

  • NewsLo
  • August 28, 2017
rand paul news
View Post
  • Featured
  • US
  • US-Feature

Rand Paul: “We Don’t Care If Trump Is Found Guilty Of Cheating During Election, He Legally Has The Power To Pardon Himself”

  • NewsLo
  • July 25, 2017
ken ham tax
View Post
  • Featured
  • US
  • US-Feature

Ken Ham: “God Owns All Of Earth And Everything On It Anyway, So Why Should He Pay Tax To Himself? It’s Pointless”

  • NewsLo
  • July 23, 2017
Trump: “Pastor Robertson Is A White Humanity Lover And The Fact That He’s Not Allowed To Say That About Me Is A Violation Of Religious Rights Freedom” 3
View Post
  • Featured
  • Religion
  • US
  • US-Feature

Trump: “Pastor Robertson Is A White Humanity Lover And The Fact That He’s Not Allowed To Say That About Me Is A Violation Of Religious Rights Freedom”

  • NewsLo
  • July 14, 2017
Trump Compares Ivanka To Syrian Children: “She’s Also Suffered A Lot As My Daughter, Had To Move Between Countries All The Time Just Like Them” 4
View Post
  • US
  • Latest Lies
  • Today's Headlines
  • US-Feature

Trump Compares Ivanka To Syrian Children: “She’s Also Suffered A Lot As My Daughter, Had To Move Between Countries All The Time Just Like Them”

  • NewsLo
  • July 9, 2017
allan parker
View Post
  • Featured
  • US
  • US-Feature

Allan Parker: “God Intervened And Prevented Trump’s Mother From Having An Abortion So He Would Become President And Put A Stop To It”

  • NewsLo
  • July 8, 2017
C-SPAN Caller Calls To Outlaw Single Moms Because They Are “Taking Us Back To Caveman Age When Men Just Bred Women” 5
View Post
  • Featured
  • Health
  • US
  • US-Feature

C-SPAN Caller Calls To Outlaw Single Moms Because They Are “Taking Us Back To Caveman Age When Men Just Bred Women”

  • NewsLo
  • July 5, 2017

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

NewsLo
  • Today’s Headlines
  • Featured
  • US
  • Politics
  • World
  • Media
  • Sports
  • Privacy Policy

Input your search keywords and press Enter.