The suspect identified himself only after blaming “rapacious American capitalism and Zionism for tampering with German engineering” to leave him with a “real lemon of a VW.”
“Right now, he’s just waiting for more details about the proposed arrangement–e.g., will they be sharing a bathroom? And does Mahmoud own an Xbox?”
TEHRAN, Iran — In a surprise announcement today, lame-duck Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad claimed to have received a severe whipping at the hands of either a representative of the Iranian police force or an attractive woman wearing leather. The punishment occured either due to his violating Iranian election law or because he derives sexual gratification from the practice. “I felt that it…