“If cutting off heads is what it takes to get ahead of the competition, than that’s what we’ll do”
At press time, Apple manufacturers were reportedly racing against the clock – the iWatch Quattro, to be exact – to produce the iWatch Cubed.
“Bing, or whatever it’s called is too confusing, plus they don’t have any doodles, which I really enjoy about Google.”
Initial reaction to the 5C has been positive. Business Week tech writer Brad Stone calls the model “colorful” and “unshockingly lightweight,” while Winston Ross of The Daily Beast says the 5C could revolutionize the industry, albeit briefly.
WASHINGTON — Faced with withering criticism and antagonistic questions from the U.S. Senate over Apple’s alleged scheme to avoid payment of billions of dollars in taxes, Apple CEO Timothy D. Cook today announced that the company had purchased the entire Senate for $420 million. Apple issued a statement saying, “Once again Apple leads the way in terms of innovation. While it has…
NEW YORK — Participants in the Occupy Wall Street anniversary reoccupation on September 17 have reportedly been left with a sour taste in their mouths after discovering that many friends left Zuccotti Park early to camp out for the new Apple iPhone. Mark Randolph, a longtime supporter of the Occupy Wall Street movement who occupied the Park for nearly two months in…
PALO ALTO, Calif. — Apple Strudel, Inc. CEO Tim Cookie held a press conference over the weekend to announce the release date of the highly-anticipated iPastry 5 – the latest in the company’s popular iPastry series which features larger breadcrumbs, a thin, sleek pastry jacket and unprecedented access to the apple cinnamon-raisin filling. “This is the future of baked goods” Cookie said…