Stan Sims, Director of the Defense Security Service (DSS), says that giving a terrorist madman access to U.S. military sites is “not ideal” and “definitely unfortunate,” but asserted that it’s “just one of those things that happens sometimes.”
BAMAKO, Mali — Former Al-Qaeda franchisee Al-Qaeda in the Islamic Maghreb (AQIM) has been officially disenfranchised by Al-Qaeda central for failing to meet certain basic franchisee obligations. The local Saharan terrorist cell had established itself as an important player in the Islamic Maghreb, the Mali-based branch of Al-Qaeda that has been developing alarmingly quickly of late. According to sources, the group was…
After realizing I wasn’t getting any respect as the leader of the world’s greatest terrorist organization, I decided to push my luck and go on vacation. Since half the world forgot about me and the other half has no clue who I am, I was able to travel freely without any complications. Here’s how my three-day excursion went. DAY 1: Pakistan I…