Bloomberg - NewsLo

Michael Bloomberg Regains Control of Company for Another Term, Renames It ‘Newer York City’

Bloomberg, who has opted against reclaiming the title of chief in favor of “mayor” of the company, is expected to enact sweeping changes at the company.

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New York

Bloomberg Calls New Downtown NYC Denny’s a Gift to City’s Poor

Bloomberg said he was especially proud that the Denny’s was applying for a full liquor license.

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E-Cigarette Ban Major Victory In War Against Quitting

Sources revealed that a similar bill is in the works that will effectively ban all decaffeinated beverages, non-alcoholic beers, and mocktails.

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Mayor Bloomberg on Suicide Watch After Election

One source did confirm that both Bloomberg and Ray Kelly voted for the current mayor as a write-in candidate, but they were not optimistic about his chances.

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New York

Mayor Bloomberg Urges Public Housing Residents to Self-Deport to Newark

“Still,” noted Bloomberg, “for the obvious reasons, I would ask that Booker be patted down before he entered my house.”

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NoNeedToSatirize

#NoNeedToSatirize: Bloomberg on racial profiling: ‘We disproportionately stop whites too much’

“In that case, incidentally, I think we disproportionately stop whites too much and minorities too little.”

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New York

Bloomberg Caught Strapping Dynamite to Verrazzano Bridge to Cut Off Staten Island

NEW YORK — Commuters along the Verrazzano-Narrows bridge yesterday morning were shocked to find NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg dangling below from a bungee-cord, duct-taping bricks of dynamite to the pilings…

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