Celebrities Lobby Congress for Drunk Driving Immunity
LOS ANGELES – In a press release today, the Screen Actors Guild announced it has hired a team of lobbyists to protect the tradition of celebrity impunity from drunk driving…
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Comedians Throw Full Support Behind Todd Akin Campaign
JEFFERSON CITY, — Miss. Rep. Todd Akin (R-MO), best known today for his controversial comments on “legitimate rape” and other unparalleled gaffes, has received an unexpected surge in donations and…
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Genealogists Still Baffled by Unsightly Offspring of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore
ST. LOUIS — Genealogists at The Genome Institute in St. Louis continue to be befuddled by the unexpectedly brutish faces of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore’s three daughters. Scientific interest…
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California Becomes First State to Ban Celebrity Marriage
LOS ANGELES — An overwhelming number of California voters gave a resounding “No” to celebrity marriage on Tuesday, making it the first state to outright ban the practice. Family First’s…
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Hollywood Studios Offer Nic Cage $75m for 5-Year Movie Moratorium
LOS ANGELES — Three of the film industry’s largest studios have banded together to finance a new offer for Academy Award-winning actor Nicolas Cage: $75 million to stay away from…
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