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Posts by tag

humor and satire

61 posts
  • Politics
  • Today's Headlines

Obama Secretly Asked Kenyan Uncle to Self-Deport

  • December 11, 2013
  • News Lo
So Onyango Okech Obama was dumbfounded when he received a curt request from White House Press Secretary Jay Carney to “politely self-deport back to Kenya so as not to create yet another headache for B.O.”
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  • NoNeedToSatirize
  • Today's Headlines

#NNTS: Tony Perkins wants the ‘liberty’ to deny birth control: ‘That’s why the Pilgrims came here’

  • November 11, 2013
  • News Lo
Family Research Council President Tony Perkins on Monday argued that companies should have the religious freedom to deny contraception coverage for women because “that’s why the Pilgrims came here.”
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  • Today's Headlines
  • Video

Video: Gay Women Will Marry Your Boyfriends

  • August 30, 2013
  • News Lo
Subscribe to  The Gay Women Channel for more great videos
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  • NoNeedToSatirize

#NoNeedToSatirize: Rumsfeld: Obama hasn’t justified Syria attack

  • August 29, 2013
  • News Lo
Former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld said Wednesday night that President Barack Obama had not done enough to justify an attack on Syria.
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  • Today's Headlines
  • US

NSA Advises Privacy Rules ‘More Like Suggestions’

  • August 23, 2013
  • News Lo
“Every now and then, there may be a mistake,” said Cole. “Maybe one here, two or three thousand there. The mistakes aren’t really illegal because, between you and me, the laws don’t really apply to the NSA.”
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  • Politics
  • Today's Headlines

Military Investigates Female-on-Male Sexual Assaults

  • August 19, 2013
  • News Lo
“Our top military personnel should not be using egregious sexual violations as some sort of Penthouse forum.”
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  • World

Tunisians Angry Over Syria Hogging America’s Short Attention Span

  • May 10, 2013
  • News Lo
TUNIS, Tunisia — “We’ll, I’m sorry that we don’t have al-Qaeda operatives running around the country and that we aren’t brutally suppressing our own citizens,” said Tunisian President Moncef Marzouki.…
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  • Media

Three Cleveland Women Freed from Captivity, Immediately Imprisoned by the Media

  • May 9, 2013
  • News Lo
CLEVELAND — The three Cleveland women who on Monday were finally freed from ten years of brutal captivity—during which they were confined to their kidnapper’s home and subjected to abuse…
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  • Entertainment

Amanda Knox Memoir Really Just Vivid Travelogue on Italian Restaurants

  • May 8, 2013
  • News Lo
Amanda Knox
NEW YORK – True-crime fans have been surprised to discover that, contrary to expectations, the new memoir from convicted-and-then-acquitted murderer Amanda Knox is naught but a series of eloquent rhapsodies…
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  • Politics

Obama Admits He’s Confused over What Guantanamo Bay Actually Is

  • May 1, 2013
  • News Lo
Amanda Knox
WASHINGTON — President Barack Obama again reiterated his desire to close the Guantanamo Bay military facility in Cuba, his comments coinciding with a massive hunger strike occurring at the base. “I…
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  • Politics

Millions of Americans File for Extension to Cheat on Their Taxes

  • April 17, 2013
  • News Lo
Amanda Knox
WASHINGTON — The Internal Revenue Service reported that an estimated 75 million Americans applied to extend the deadline for filing their 2012 income tax return, up 20% from last year.…
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  • World

Hoping for a Little Attention, Syrian Citizens Threaten to Nuke the U.S.

  • April 15, 2013
  • News Lo
ALEPPO, Syria – A group of desperate citizens in the beleaguered city of Aleppo, Syria are threatening to attack the United States with nuclear weapons in hopes that their ridiculous,…
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  • World

Pope’s Foot Fetish Leaves Traditionalists Weary, Liberals Delighted

  • April 3, 2013
  • News Lo
VATICAN CITY — Last month’s election of Pope Francis, a celebrated advocate for the poor in his native Argentina, has been met with acclaim by those hoping for change in…
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  • Politics

Guantanamo Bay Detainees Pretty Sure They’ll be Released Any Day Now

  • April 2, 2013
  • News Lo
guantanamo
WASHINGTON– Following President Obama’s inauguration ceremony on Monday, the 166 detainees currently being held at the Guantanamo Bay detention camp issued a statement saying they anticipate being released “pretty much any…
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  • New York

John Liu Mistakes New York for Detroit, Runs on Corruption Record

  • March 20, 2013
  • News Lo
NEW YORK — New York City Comptroller John Liu has announced his intention to run for mayor of New York City. Liu, mistaking New York for Detroit, started his campaign…
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  • US

America Unfazed By New Mexico Semen Attack

  • March 7, 2013
  • News Lo
distraction
ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. — In a stunning turn of events, the American people appear to be completely unfazed by the fact that a New Mexico man threw semen at two women…
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  • US

Exploitative Beauty Pageant Dethrones Beauty Queen for Making Exploitative Video

  • March 2, 2013
  • News Lo
WILMINGTON, Del. – The board of the Miss Teen USA Beauty Pageant has forced the resignation of Miss Teen Delaware, Melissa King, after it was revealed that Ms. King willingly…
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  • Media

Director to Honor Newtown Victims By Shamelessly Exploiting Their Story

  • February 12, 2013
  • News Lo
sandy-hook-memorial
RIDEGFIELD, Conn. — Big-time Hollywood director Jonathan Bucari has announced plans to memorialize the victims of the December 14 tragedy in Newtown, Connecticut, in the time-honored tradition of being the…
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  • US

Public Shocked to Discover Hadiya Pendleton’s Murder Wasn’t at all Unusual

  • February 11, 2013
  • News Lo
THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA – The American public is reacting with “shock” and “bewilderment” to reports that the murder of Chicago teen Hadiya Pendleton was not a “rare, once…
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  • Sports

Lakers’ Gasol Tears Plantar Fascia, World Peace Exposes D’Antoni as Mastermind

  • February 10, 2013
  • News Lo
sports network tv
LOS ANGELES—Pau Gasol has torn the plantar fascia of his right foot—an unfortunate accident that sources have revealed wasn’t really an accident at all, but rather an inconspicuous assault designed…
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  • US

Owners of New Blackberry 10 Dislike “Dependency, Clinginess” Feature

  • February 7, 2013
  • News Lo
WATERLOO, Ontario — At a recent product launch, Thorsten Heins, CEO of the struggling company Blackberry, unveiled the new Blackberry10 smartphone, which comes equipped with pre-installed apps that beg consumers…
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  • Politics

GOP to Shed “Stupid Party” Label in Favor of “Really, Really Stupid Party”

  • February 6, 2013
  • News Lo
WASHINGTON — Hoping to no longer be known as “The Stupid Party,” a majority of Republicans believe the GOP needs to reshape its image so that it can instead be…
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  • Sports

Yet Another Superbowl Goes to the Team That Prayed Hardest

  • February 5, 2013
  • News Lo
NEW ORLEANS — The Baltimore Ravens beat out the San Francisco 49ers 34-31 on Sunday to take home their first Super Bowl title in thirteen years. Incredibly, the game also…
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  • New York

NYPD to Begin Invading People’s Privacy from a Safe Distance

  • February 5, 2013
  • News Lo
NEW YORK — Get ready New York City because the NYPD may be frisking you and invading your privacy without you even knowing it. With the help of new infrared…
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