Tilda Swinton’s MoMA Exhibit Revealed to be Homeless Relief Campaign

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NEW YORK — A controversial MoMA exhibit, featuring actress Tilda Swinton sleeping in an elevated glass box, has been revealed to be an intricate campaign aimed at highlighting the plight of the city’s homeless. The piece, titled “Maybe,” is exhibited without accompanying notes, but a MoMA spokesperson revealed its meaning during a special press conference today. “It’s our policy to not over-explain…

Pentagon: “North Korea Just Asking for Democracy”

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WASHINGTON — After a North Korean diplomat threatened South Korea with “final destruction” during the United Nations Conference on Disarmament on Tuesday, U.S. Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta told reporters that the increasingly provocative nation is “just begging for some democracy.” Specifically, North Korean diplomat Jon Yong Ryong told the meeting, “As the saying goes, a newborn puppy knows no fear of…

Weekly Fast-Forward: The News Before It Happens

Politics Old-Timer to Regale Children with Tales of Life Before 2012 Presidential Race LANSING, Mich. — Old Man Watkins, a retired machine-parts fabricator from East Lansing, will amaze his grandchildren with the revelation that he remembers what life was like before the seemingly endless 2012 Presidential race. “It was so long ago, but I’ll do my best,” the septuagenarian will strain to…