United Nations Arms Trade Treaty Supported by Everyone Except Syria, Iran, North Korea and The NRA

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NEW YORK – Earlier this week, the United Nations voted overwhelmingly to approve a historic treaty that would provide additional regulations to the international arms trade market, tying a nation’s human rights record to its ability to buy weapons. The Arms Trade Treaty received almost unanimous support, with votes against it coming only from Iran, Syria, North Korea and the NRA. “Yes,…

NRA Prepares for Annual Congress Appreciation Day

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WASHINGTON – The National Rifle Association is busy preparing for its Congressional Appreciation Day, an annual “thank you” to federal lawmakers who have helped the pro-gun organization realize its legislative dreams over the previous twelve months by ignoring the concerns of everyday Americans. “This is my favorite season,” said coordinating manager Cathy Arensmeyer as she tucked a carton of cigarettes into a…

North Korea Declares ‘No-Backsies’ if Nuclear War Occurs

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OSAKA, Japan – Following a series of verbal jousting between the governments of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea, or North Korea, and the United States of America, North Korean leader Kim Jong-un has declared the  “no-backsies” rule to be in effect in the event of a nuclear war between his country, America and its allies. “North Korea retains its first strike…

SCOTUS Considers Relinquishing Concept of Love to Gays

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WASHINGTON — Americans across the country have been intently following a case introduced to the Supreme Court on Tuesday that will determine whether or not gays and lesbians will be given sole access to the concept of love. The potentially landmark court case follows the passage of a 2008 California referendum that reserves love solely to heterosexual couples. However, attitudes nationwide have…

Michael Bay Chosen to Direct Next North Korean Propaganda Film

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LOS ANGELES — Hollywood director Michael Bay has been chosen by the North Korean government to oversee the production of its next major propaganda film. Bay—who has directed some of the largest-grossing movies in recent history but receives scant critical praise—accepted the job despite the project’s likely anti-American content. “You think I care about the message?” Bay said when asked if he…