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Posts by tag

Newslo Political satire

32 posts
  • US

Conspiracy Theorists Fear Romney Victory Will Put Them Out of Business

  • October 15, 2012
  • News Lo
WASHINGTON – A Newslo voter poll of conspiracy theorists shows an abrupt change in perception since the first presidential debate last week. Fervent believers in baseless theories about President Obama…
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  • Politics

Undecided Voter Goes With Obama after Scarlett Johansson Endorsement

  • October 15, 2012
  • News Lo
DES MOINES, Iowa – Iowa factory worker Jonathan Flagler, 30, has decided to cast his vote for Barack Obama after actress Scarlett Johansson vocally endorsed the incumbent president. Flagler had…
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  • Politics

“Times are Tough” Says Man Speaking to $20,000-a-Plate Crowd

  • October 15, 2012
  • News Lo
ATLANTA — The nation’s crippling economic downturn has ushered in unprecedented levels of unemployment, home foreclosure, and bankruptcy. No one understands the pain of average Americans struggling with hunger, joblessness,…
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  • Politics

CIA Resorts to Stealing Citizens’ Identities After Budget Cuts

  • October 7, 2012
  • News Lo
LANGLEY, Va. — According to an anonymous whistle-blower within the CIA, after the passage of last month’s defense department budget cuts, the agency has resorted to identity theft to fund…
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  • Politics

Bloomberg Asks for Creation of “Nanny-In-Chief” Cabinet Position, Nominates Self

  • October 7, 2012
  • News Lo
WASHINGTON, D.C. — New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg has petitioned President Obama to create a new cabinet position that he calls “Nanny-in-Chief.” The new office would be responsible for…
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  • US

Report: Credit Card Not Free Money

  • October 7, 2012
  • News Lo
AGOURA HILLS, Calif. — Cal State Northridge grad-student Derek Zithfvelt was appalled to discover the little plastic card he has been toting around in his wallet to use for expenses…
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  • Politics

Congress After Hours: What Congress Is Doing When It’s Doing Nothing

  • October 3, 2012
  • News Lo
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Capitol Hill interns have leaked shocking footage of Congressional proceedings that seem to explain the legislative branch’s notorious gridlock. Long criticized for its stasis on any productive…
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  • Politics

Congressional Candidate Deemed Racist After “Black Friend” Refuses to Defend Him

  • September 20, 2012
  • News Lo
BISMARCK, N.D. — North Dakota electoral politics are not known for their sprawling diversity, but race has recently taken a front seat in the state’s lone congressional battle. During a…
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