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Posts by tag

news makeup

117 posts
  • Today's Headlines
  • US

Markets Throw ā€˜Menstrual Tantrum’ as Janet Yellen Prepares to Take over the Fed

  • January 8, 2014
  • NewsLo
  • No comments
Markets Throw ā€˜Menstrual Tantrum’ as Janet Yellen Prepares to Take over the Fed
ā€œI’m all for equal rights and everything,ā€ said James Tomwell of the Kato Institute, ā€œbut there’s a reason men have always been in charge of the Fed. Women are emotional beings—which is great—but the market needs calm and reason, or else a recession could happen.ā€
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#NoNeedToSatirize: Speaker presents proof Grover Norquist is a secret Muslim: ā€˜He has a beard’
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  • 1 min
  • NoNeedToSatirize
  • US

#NoNeedToSatirize: Speaker presents proof Grover Norquist is a secret Muslim: ā€˜He has a beard’

  • May 31, 2013
  • NewsLo
  • One comment
ā€œAs you see, he has a beard,ā€ she pointed out. ā€œHe’s married a Muslim woman. But he denies that he has converted himself. He denies that.ā€
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GrubHub and Seamless Order Each Other’s Companies for Lunch
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  • 2 min
  • US

GrubHub and Seamless Order Each Other’s Companies for Lunch

  • May 24, 2013
  • NewsLo
  • One comment
NEW YORK – “GrubHub’s online food ordering service is now so advanced,” announced CEO Matt Maloney, “that our board of directors was actually able to order the entire company of…
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Florida Considers Plan to Execute Criminals Right in the Courtroom
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  • 2 min
  • US

Florida Considers Plan to Execute Criminals Right in the Courtroom

  • May 3, 2013
  • NewsLo
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TALLAHASSEE, Fla. – Florida Governor Rick Scott is reportedly considering a bill sent to him by the state legislature that would ā€œspeed upā€ the capital punishment process in Florida by…
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Lindsey Graham to Give Syria Chemical Weapons Until He is Justified in Bombing Them
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  • 2 min
  • Politics

Lindsey Graham to Give Syria Chemical Weapons Until He is Justified in Bombing Them

  • May 2, 2013
  • NewsLo
  • 2 comments
WASHINGTON — In an effort to gain more concrete justification for US military intervention in Syria, Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC) has unofficially admitted to sending Bashar al-Assad a slew of…
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Special Report: Tamerlan Tsarnaev Wore Tighty-Whiteys, Had Mole on Left Ankle
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  • 2 min
  • Media

Special Report: Tamerlan Tsarnaev Wore Tighty-Whiteys, Had Mole on Left Ankle

  • May 1, 2013
  • NewsLo
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BOSTON – An investigation conducted by Newslo has uncovered the shocking and highly germane fact that Tamerlan Tsarnaev—the deceased suspect in the April 15 Boston Marathon bombings—wore tighty-whitey underwear, as…
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Obama Admits He’s Confused over What Guantanamo Bay Actually Is
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  • 2 min
  • Politics

Obama Admits He’s Confused over What Guantanamo Bay Actually Is

  • May 1, 2013
  • NewsLo
  • No comments
WASHINGTON —Ā President Barack Obama again reiterated his desire to close the Guantanamo Bay military facility in Cuba, his comments coinciding with a massive hunger strike occurring at the base. “I…
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Man Wrongfully Incarcerated Leaves Jail, Has Heart Attack
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  • 2 min
  • New York

Man Wrongfully Incarcerated Leaves Jail, Has Heart Attack

  • March 26, 2013
  • NewsLo
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NEW YORK — David Ranta, the New York City man who had been wrongfully accused and subsequently incarcerated for nearly twenty-three years over the murder of a Brooklyn rabbi, has…
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