Arizona Governor Signs No Gun Left Behind Bill

PHOENIX — Arizona Governor Jan Brewer on Monday signed legislation saving the lives of thousands of guns removed from the state’s streets through municipal buy-back programs. Instead of destroying the innocent firearms in a symbolic, if graphic, statement against gun violence, towns and villages across the state are now required by law to resell the guns, ensuring that the firearms have a…

Biden Declares “Mission Accomplished” After Gun Control Task Force Comes Up with an Idea

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WASHINGTON — Earlier today Vice President Joe Biden, the head of President Obama’s gun control task force, presented the President with the task force’s official findings- an idea on how to stop gun violence in America. Satisfied, President Obama announced that the gun control task force’s job is done congratulated Biden on a job well done. “The American people asked us in…

The NRA Announces New “Guns for Girls” Program

WASHINGTON — Citing a lack of advocacy or interest toward domestic abuse and violence against women, President of the NRA, David Keene announced the introduction of a new “Guns for Girls” program targeted at addressing this issue. Shocked by the fact that 1/3 of women in the world will experience some form of violence during their lives, the NRA, largely considered one…

NRA: Crazed Shooters Will Eventually Tire Themselves Out

BROOKFIELD, Wis. — In the wake of tragic shootings in Colorado and Wisconsin there’s been a lot of talk about the need to pass new gun control laws, particularly those meant to restrict private citizens from possessing automatic weapons, high capacity magazines, and surface-to-air missiles. But the National Rifle Association (NRA) denies that restricting firearms ownership is the solution. Instead, the pro-gun…