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Ted Cruz: “First Thing I Will Do As President Is Shut Down SCOTUS”

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics, Politics-Feature, Today's Headlines June 25, 2015

“That is my solemn oath, and Americans know Ted Cruz always keeps his promises”

Ted Cruz Goes On ObamaCare, Also Joins In On Immigration

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Health, Today's Headlines April 5, 2015

“It will be one of the first things I tackle upon taking office. That I promise you”

The New Mandatory $325 Contribution To The Obama Campaign

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics, Today's Headlines December 30, 2014

“The really devastating part is the fact that it’s all being done legally”

Obama Offers Trade-Off To GOP: The End Of Obamacare, Except For Illegal Immigrants

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Health, Today's Headlines, US November 21, 2014

“I’ve thought about it for a while and came to the conclusion that this is the only possible compromise for all parties involved”

HealthCare.gov Customers Enjoy New Benefits, Microsoft Zune Music Passes

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics, Today's Headlines January 6, 2014

Assuring the nation that the problematic rollout of the Affordable Care Act “will not be another Windows Vista” has proven difficult for DelBene, who has attempted to sweeten the deal by adding extra perks to the package of benefits.

NC Senator Hopes to Fight Obamacare by Starting World War III

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Today's Headlines, US December 15, 2013

October 1st, 2013 [the day the ACA went into effect] will, in time, be recognized as a much darker day, especially if Obamacare begins invading Eastern Europe before we’re ready to stop it.”

Obama Claims Obamacare More Popular than Facebook

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics, Today's Headlines December 9, 2013

“I was a little surprised when I was told my approval rating among young voters is only 41 percent,” Obama admitted. “I guess there are more Myspace users out there than I realized.”

Administration Seeks to Insert Pro-Obamacare Propaganda in Preschool Sex Ed

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics, Today's Headlines December 5, 2013

To dispel myths like these and proselytize Obamacare, the administration has tapped a Democratic “strike team” to give “the talk” to the nation’s schoolchildren.

Rep. Radel Blames Cocaine Bust on Obamacare Fight

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo DC, Politics, Today's Headlines November 22, 2013

“Obamacare is horrible, and I found myself desperate for an extra boost,” Radel admitted in a statement released today.

More Americans Enrolled in ‘Beer of the Month’ Clubs than Obamacare, Experts Say

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics, Today's Headlines November 13, 2013

“This is nothing really,” Boehner said. “Take a look at nationwide ‘Sausage of the Month’ club memberships, and you’ll really see how grim these numbers are.”

Louie Gohmert Blames Middle-East Peace Failure on Obamacare

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo DC, Politics, Today's Headlines November 11, 2013

“The president lied about Obamacare,” Gohmert said, “and now Israelis and Palestinians have to pay the price.”

Adult Entertainers Excited Obamacare covers Sex Toys

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Today's Headlines, US November 7, 2013

“Trust me,” she added. “A couple of free blow-up dolls on the taxpayers’ dime are a hell of a lot cheaper than another syphilis outbreak clogging up the ER.”

Obama Delays Individual Mandate until Republicans Resume Government Shutdown

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics, Today's Headlines October 25, 2013

“The delay will continue indefinitely, in six-week increments, until we see adequate movement in public support for the president’s policies,” threatened White House Press Secretary Jay Carney.

Drone Delivers Healthcare to Yemen Terrorists in Latest Obamacare Gaffe

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics, Today's Headlines October 24, 2013

“It was like, one moment it’s just a normal day, and the next, completed signup forms are raining down from the sky and a whole building is enrolled in the president’s health care plan.”

Marco Rubio Proud to Have Stopped Dems From Gutting Obamacare

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo DC, Politics October 22, 2013

When told that he had, in fact, championed shutting down the government unless Obamacare was defunded, Rubio adamantly shook his head. “No, I didn’t,” he said.

Inhofe Insists Obamacare Would Have Given Him AIDS

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics, Today's Headlines October 21, 2013

“The Affordable Care Act does not force doctors or anyone else to inject American citizens with AIDS. That’s… Christ, are we really discussing this? That’s beyond crazy. It’s, like, Alex Jones crazy.”

Media Crowns GOP Winners in Debt Ceiling Battle

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Media, Today's Headlines October 20, 2013

“They forced the President to kill Obamacare and replace it with the Affordable Care Act, they lowered taxes for the 1%, and they eliminated the Minimum Wage altogether.”

Report: Obamacare Websites Slowed by Patriotic Virus

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Today's Headlines, US October 14, 2013

“It’s not entirely clear where this virus came from or who designed it,” Fourier said. “But we do know that it’s pissed off, and apparently listens to a significant amount of talk radio.”

Suicidal Americans Glad ‘Death Panels’ Finally Open for Business

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Today's Headlines, US October 7, 2013

“When Sarah Palin announced that Obamacare would allow doctors to decide whether old folks like me should live based on our productivity in society. That’s when I decided I would be an unproductive grandma and just wait it out.”

Boehner Resigns Speakership, Claims Job ‘Just Isn’t Fun Anymore’

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo DC, Politics, Today's Headlines October 3, 2013

“These guys are just mean. I keep asking them to cut me some slack and let me turn the government back on, but they’re like big bullies. If they don’t get their shiny new toys like a de-funded Obamacare or massive cuts to Social Security and Medicare then they throw a fit.

Obamacare Kills 2, Wounds Dozens in First Week

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics October 2, 2013

“The greatest tragedy is that they never made it to the part where they buy insurance,” Secretary Sebelius said. “So they won’t be covered for these injuries.”

As Obamacare Looms, SeaWorld to Begin Firing Animals

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Today's Headlines, US September 26, 2013

Ben Little, an expert on animal workers with the Institute of Animal Labor, said that SeaWorld’s decision represents the largest single layoff of marine life employees in American history.

Republicans Appear Not to Like Obamacare

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics September 23, 2013
John Boehner

“You’d think in the three years since Obamacare passed, they’d voice some sort of stance …”

Doctor Claims Obamacare Requires Universal Chemotherapy for Sick and Healthy Alike

Avatar of News Lo By News Lo Politics, Today's Headlines August 16, 2013

“Now, neither Dr. Fata nor I read through all 10,000 pages of the regulations, but the stench of government overreach is unmistakable.”

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