Rogaine Backs Romney-Ryan Ticket

Romney-rogaine

NEW BRUNSWICK, N.J. — A spokesman for Johnson & Johnson has issued a statement claiming that Rogaine, one of its subsidiaries, has officially backed Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan. Rumors contend that the endorsement came complete with a seven-figure donation to the campaign and a lifetime supply of the hair-growth supplement. Sources within Rogaine claim that, while the company has never before…

Palin, Bachmann Announce New Reality Show, ‘Riding Lady Liberty’

ANCHORAGE, Alaska — Former Vice Presidential candidate and human caricature of misinformation Sarah Palin has confirmed the completion of a new reality show in which she travels across the heart of the United States with Representative Michele Bachmann, who takes on the roles of foolhardy sidekick and quirky racist. The program, which will air on FOX this October, will be named “Riding…