President Obama

White House Accidentally Outs CIA Agent Hamid Karzai

The White House declined comment on the disclosure. It was unclear whether or how the disclosure would affect attitudes towards Karzai and his government, which are already incredibly low.

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DC
Politics

Indebted Students Hope to Repay Loans with Obama’s Empty Words

Brad Temper, Rutgers class of ’10, said that while he does not have nearly enough money to repay his student loans, he now owns an “abundance of hollow promises” given to him by President Obama.

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World

Obama in Europe: German Crowds Drop ‘Yes We Can’ for ‘Maybe You Will’

President Obama closed his speech with a final, desperate attempt to win back the German nation’s love: “What if I made techno the official music of the United States? I’ll blast it from every street corner—will that help you forgive me?”

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Conspiracy Theorists Fear Romney Victory Will Put Them Out of Business

WASHINGTON – A Newslo voter poll of conspiracy theorists shows an abrupt change in perception since the first presidential debate last week. Fervent believers in baseless theories about President Obama…

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Politics

Wall St. To Democrats: “Stop Treating Me Like Your Sidepiece”

NEW YORK — Leaked late-night text messages from Wall St. to the Democratic National Committee have revealed Wall St.’s growing discontent towards liberals’ treatment of the financial community as an…

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Politics

Politicians Vow to Start Caring for Troops After Next War

WASHINGTON — At a press conference in the Rose Garden today, President Obama announced that the administration fully intends to take care of American troops after the nation’s incipient war…

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