U.S. Optimistic Weapons, Training to Syrian Rebels Will Not Be Turned on Them
“It’s hard to break out of time-tested tropes, but we’ll do our best.”
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Syria
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Paralyzed by Civil War, Syria Forswears Metaphors
“With nearly 7 million people driven from their homes, infection and dietary crises are having a field day,” Vries said. “At this point, it’s hard to imagine Syria getting back up on its feet.”
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Congressional Approval Ratings Hit New Low in Syria
“We’re better off hoping for Santa Claus to bomb Assad than these as*hats,” he added.
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Syria Vows to Treat Israelis Slightly Better Than Syrians
JERUSALEM — Responding to three reported Israeli airstrikes this year, Syria has warned its neighbor against any further attacks. Backing up its rhetoric, Syria has targeted Tishreen medium-range ballistic missiles…
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Hoping for a Little Attention, Syrian Citizens Threaten to Nuke the U.S.
ALEPPO, Syria – A group of desperate citizens in the beleaguered city of Aleppo, Syria are threatening to attack the United States with nuclear weapons in hopes that their ridiculous,…
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Syria Seeks to Compete in Middle Eastern Violence, Launches Public Relations Campaign
DAMASCUS — Taking advantage of the public relations opportunity created by the Hamas-Israel ceasefire, Syrian president Bashar al-Assad has launched a campaign to garner international attention towards his murderous campaign…
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America Excited For Return to Golden Age of Overthrowing Middle-Eastern Democracies
WASHINGTON–The Arab Spring germinated the seeds of democracy in nations like Egypt, Libya, and Syria. Decades of totalitarian repression have proven too much for freedom-loving peoples in the Middle East…
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