“Maybe New Orleans should ask the French or Canadian government for help, in their native language. I’m sure they take care of their own”
“Of course, this leads us, when there are no moral absolutes, leads us to sexual immorality, leads us to sexual abuse, leads us to perversion and, of course, no hope. No hope!”
“It’s not like I plan on shutting them down when I’m President”
“Honest-to-God, normal, traditional Christians are on the verge of being extinct”
“America blames white police officers for shooting black men without even wondering why such things happen”
“I feel ashamed seeing how low we have sunk as a nation”
“It will be one of the first things I tackle upon taking office. That I promise you”
“That’s really the only option that works for me”
“I have a strange feeling that allowing him to run is going to come back and bite me in the ass”
This time next year, if you want to honor Father’s Day, you must spend those 24 hours fighting to keep fatherhood pure. Go out and place “Ted Cruz ’16” on all your neighbors’ lawns. That, at least, will be a very good start.
“I’ll be the first Latino president, as well as the first president to love America so much he’ll tattoo it to his body to show it,” Cruz explained. “And it’s about time, I say.”
“The human body is 70% water, and Agenda 21 – so-named because it refers to the 21% of the body not made of water- is a plot to control that 70%. Don’t let them control your 70%!”
“If they need a little push making their way into Heaven, that okay too,” the book says. “Jesus will understand if you help them ‘fall’ down a flight of stairs. It’s what Uncle Cruz would do!”
“At least American soldiers have weapons with which to defend themselves,” the book adds.
“Sure, right now there’s no Confederacy,” Cruz said. “But there are still three long years left in Obama’s term—which is plenty of time for another round of secession.”
Cruz, who was visiting Iowa at the time, also told Karl that he considered himself a U.S. citizen by birth and eligible to run for president — even though he was born in Canada — because his mother was a U.S. citizen.