NewsLo
NewsLo
  • Home
  • Business
    • Accounting
    • Advertising
    • Branding
    • Career
    • Cyber Security
    • Entrepreneur
    • Jobs
    • Management
    • Marketing
    • Non Profit
    • Sales
    • Search Engine Optimization
    • Web Design
  • Finance
    • Banking
    • Bankruptcy
    • Budgeting
    • Credit
    • Debt
    • Estate Wills & Trusts
    • Home Improvements
    • Law
    • Loans
    • Personal Finance
    • Taxes
    • Shopping
  • Investment
    • Crypto Currency
    • Gold & Silver
    • Hard Assets
    • Real Estate
    • Retirement
    • Stocks & Bonds
    • Trading
  • Real Estate
    • Buying
    • Selling
    • Commercial Construction
    • Construction Law
    • Home Improvement
    • Loans
    • Property Management
    • Real Estate Laws
    • Rental Property
  • Insurance
    • Auto Insurance
    • Commercial Real Estate Insurance
    • Crop Insurance
    • Dental Insurance
    • Disability Insurance
    • Health Insurance
    • Home Owners Insurance
    • Identity Theft Protection
    • Insurance Law
    • Investment Insurance
    • Life Insurance
    • Pet Insurance
    • Renters Insurance
  • Contact Us
  • Entertainment
  • Today's Headlines

The Bachelorette Week 6, as Seen by A Bro Who Loves Beer

  • June 30, 2014
  • NewsLo
  • No comments
  • 2 minute read
Total
0
Shares
0
0
0

Alright, so Monday night I was with my roommate and his girlfriend. She demanded the remote, and seeing as Kyle lost his cojones somewhere back in month 2 of their relationship, we all had to sit through “The Bachelorette” episode. I guess it was the 6th week of the season, which sounds way too long to me. If this chick were trying to find a husband with a bunch of my ΣAE bros, it would’ve taken one week until they all realized that no girl could break up our bromance. Frats before cats.

Since I already was into my second six-pack (beer, but I have the abs too) and was swiping left and right like a pro on Tinder anyways, I stayed watching TV. Somehow it was actually mad entertaining watching these idiots giving up their rights to manhood for some chick. And the sad thing is, I don’t even think they’re SLEEPING with her. Pathetic.

Anyways, the bachelorette (a.k.a. desperate single girl) manages to end up in Venice, Italy, with all of her suitors (a.k.a. desperate single men). First, she picks a date with a scrawny guy over a jacked bro – all I could wonder was how much he benches. Then I wondered what was wrong with all of these guys because they were all smiling and getting along with each other. WTF?! This is a competition. C’mon, guys, you’re all going after one prime piece of real estate to take for your own. You should be brawling and backstabbing every chance you get. Take a page out of Luis Suarez’s book if you have to.

There were points I thought I was going to vom all over my roommate and his girlfriend. Like when one guy says, “She makes me feel like we belong.” No, bro. Then another guy admits to sending the girl three love letters as a “secret admirer.” If that wasn’t enough, her date with the scrawny guy is in a masquerade hall. Look. If you really want a date with a chick, invite her over and cook some pasta. Even that could be pushing it, but there’s more of a chance of getting laid if she’s already at your place. Words to live by.

And then all men’s worst nightmare: She puts them through a lie detector test. Somehow they luck out and she’s dumb enough to throw away the results, but I sort of wish she hadn’t. That would’ve been dope TV.

After what felt like three years (meaning another six-pack), she finally sends a guy home after he tells her he’s falling for her. He was devastated. I felt bad for him a bit, but then he says he thought about her becoming his wife. Then my gag reflex kicked in.

All in all, if I have to watch “The Bachelorette” again, I’ll make a sick drinking game of it. Other guy’s pain is a bro’s pleasure.

Total
0
Shares
Share 0
Tweet 0
Pin it 0
Related Topics
  • Bachelorette
  • Bachelorette reviews
  • The Bachelorette
  • The Bachelorette reviews
NewsLo

Previous Article
After Hobby Lobby Ruling, Conservatives Worry Supreme Court May Be Leading America to Sharia Law 1
  • Today's Headlines
  • US

After Hobby Lobby Ruling, Conservatives Worry Supreme Court May Be Leading America to Sharia Law

  • June 30, 2014
  • NewsLo
View Post
Next Article
Detroit Orders Fighter Jets In Effort to Reduce Violence 2
  • US

Detroit Orders Fighter Jets In Effort to Reduce Violence

  • June 30, 2014
  • NewsLo
View Post
You May Also Like
Movies
View Post
  • Entertainment

Top 5 Movies Every Finance Major Should Add to Their Watch List

  • NewsLo
  • July 7, 2020
benefits of music for children
View Post
  • Entertainment

Benefits of Kids Song and Music in Early Childhood Development

  • NewsLo
  • September 18, 2019
fantasy sports
View Post
  • Entertainment

Introduction to Fantasy Sports

  • NewsLo
  • March 30, 2018
View Post
  • Entertainment
  • Entertainment Feature

The Positive Correlation Between Bitcoin and Certain Events Around the Globe

  • NewsLo
  • September 27, 2017
Brit Hume
View Post
  • Entertainment
  • Entertainment Feature
  • Featured
  • Media
  • Media-Feature

Brit Hume Said About Health Insurance 

  • NewsLo
  • July 17, 2017
Trump Compares Ivanka To Syrian Children: “She’s Also Suffered A Lot As My Daughter, Had To Move Between Countries All The Time Just Like Them” 3
View Post
  • US
  • Latest Lies
  • Today's Headlines
  • US-Feature

Trump Compares Ivanka To Syrian Children: “She’s Also Suffered A Lot As My Daughter, Had To Move Between Countries All The Time Just Like Them”

  • NewsLo
  • July 9, 2017
Spicer: “Trump Has The Legal Right To Cancel SCOTUS Because They Serve At His Pleasure” 4
View Post
  • Featured
  • Latest Lies
  • Today's Headlines

Spicer: “Trump Has The Legal Right To Cancel SCOTUS Because They Serve At His Pleasure”

  • NewsLo
  • June 20, 2017
Caitlyn Jenner News
View Post
  • Entertainment
  • Entertainment Feature
  • Featured

Caitlyn Jenner: “GOP Baseball Shooting Proves That Liberals Hate Gays”

  • NewsLo
  • June 19, 2017

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

NewsLo
  • Today’s Headlines
  • Featured
  • US
  • Politics
  • World
  • Media
  • Sports
  • Privacy Policy

Input your search keywords and press Enter.