Tunisians Angry Over Syria Hogging America’s Short Attention Span

TUNIS, Tunisia — “We’ll, I’m sorry that we don’t have al-Qaeda operatives running around the country and that we aren’t brutally suppressing our own citizens,” said Tunisian President Moncef Marzouki. “But I don’t think it is too much to ask for one CNN reporter to stop by every so often.”

Tunisia was the birthplace of the Arab Spring, but many of its residents are upset that American news coverage quickly overlooked it when the governments of Libya, Egypt and Syria were threatened and/or overthrown.

“Maybe it is my fault for being too moderate. If I had studied Islamofascism instead of the peaceful protests of Mahmoud Ghandi and South Africa’s transition from Apartheid, Americans might actually give a shit,” added the clearly bitter Marzouki.

The Tunisian government has actively studied ways of getting more attention for the transitioning nation. The government has asked its Islamist Enhada Party (English for “the Renaissance Party”), which won a plurality in the last election, to change its name to something more threatening. “We saw how much publicity the Muslim Brotherhood got, so the government asked us to capitalize on that,” said Rashid al-Ghannushi, the party’s leader. “We are currently debating changing our name to the Jihadist Front or the Death to the American Infidels Party. We think these names would make great primetime news stories.

“We are also putting a referendum for indiscriminate government-sponsored slaughter up for a vote,” Marzouki admitted. “While the populous may not be thrilled about government-sponsored death squads, they do seem a little fed up with the hype surrounding the hullabaloo in Syria while we continue to be ignored. It seems like a small price to pay for some American attention.”