DES MOINES, Iowa – Iowa factory worker Jonathan Flagler, 30, has decided to cast his vote for Barack Obama after actress Scarlett Johansson vocally endorsed the incumbent president. Flagler had reviewed both Obama and Romney’s political platforms and looked at each candidate’s record, but still could not make up his mind until the blonde bombshell threw her weight behind the president.
“Her character in ‘The Avengers’ just seemed so repentant and moral, that if Ms. Johansson thinks the president is doing a good job, I would be foolish not to listen,” Flagler said. “I was ambivalent about Obamacare and the president’s Middle East policy, but she is just so beautiful that it’s hard not to listen when she opens her luscious lips.”
Flagler’s wife Liz though, is far from impressed. “Just because she is a buxom young tart doesn’t mean she knows anything about politics,” The 26-year-old nurse said. “I will be voting for Romney due to Brad Pitt’s mom’s endorsement.”
“Anyone can be beautiful, but that woman created beauty. How can a sane person not take what she says to heart?” Flagler said.
The political rift created by the rival celebrity endorsements has caused tension within the Flagger marriage. A few days ago the couple was thrown out of a local Old Country Buffet, where they were seen screaming at each other while John thrust the DVD case of ‘Girl With a Pearl Earring’ in his wife’s face.