Vatican Fires Gay Priest, Re-Hires Him As “Climate Consultant”

“Vatican City – The Vatican on Saturday fired a monsignor who came out as gay on the eve of a big meeting of the world’s bishops to discuss church outreach to gays, divorcees and more traditional Catholic families. The Vatican took action after Krzysztof Charamsa, a mid-level official in its doctrine office, came out in newspaper interviews in Italy and Poland saying he was happy and proud to be a gay priest, and that he was in love with a man whom he identified as his boyfriend.

““The decision to make such a pointed statement on the eve of the opening of the synod appears very serious and irresponsible, since it aims to subject the synod assembly to undue media pressure,” the Vatican spokesman, the Rev. Federico Lombardi, said in a statement. As a result, Charamsa could no longer work at the Vatican or its pontifical universities, Lombardi said. Despite his dismissal, Charamsa remains a priest, although Lombardi hinted that his superiors could take further action.

However, in a bizarre twist, the same priest was re-hired shortly after, on Tuesday, as a “personal climate consultant” for Pope Francis. Lombardi commented on this move by saying that it would be “inhumane” to leave a priest who has served the Vatican well with no livelihood, despite the fact that “his differences make him an undesirable person to have in the center of Christianity.”

“Christianity as a religion is based on peace, love and forgiveness. The Vatican would not set a good example by stripping one of its own of all chances of a normal life after firing him. Even though his sexual preferences make him a persona-non-grata around the Vatican, His Holiness the Pope saw it fit to re-hire monsignor Charamsa in a different property. It is Christian to forgive and offer second chances,” Lombardi stated.

Speaking exclusively with Newslo, the Pope elaborated on his unusual decision by saying that “the world has too many homosexuals and not enough climate scientists.”

“All men were created equal, but somewhere along the way, many of them have lost touch with their inner selves and have corrupted their souls by fornicating with other members of their kind. This is a sin, there is no doubt about that, but we would be wrong to slay all sinners; they are merely a tool of the Devil, who is really to blame for all evil. Therefore, sinners must be helped to find their true path, and in today’s modern world, that is not an easy task. I have decided to personally try to help one of our own fallen members, by giving him a second chance at life as a Christian. He became a priest out of his love for God, it would be wrong to now punish him for it,” Pope Francis told Newslo.

Asked why he decided to shape Charamsa’s second chance into a position named “personal climate consultant,” the Pope replied: “You know, I like to think I am progressive and forward-thinking in many things. However, homosexuality is something I cannot be tolerant of. Climate change, on the other hand, is a burning issue that plagues all of us on this planet. So, I believe that through talking about climate change and attempting to raise awareness and find a solution for it, I would be brought closer to the strayed sheep of God’s flock, homosexuals being many of them. Then I will be able to talk to them and guide them back on the road of light, starting with Charamsa.”