Washington State is Hiring, Potheads Finally Wanted

TACOMA, Wa. — Washington State is looking for pot experts to advise them on marijuana and thousands of unemployed pot smokers and college students who will be unemployed in the near future are applying.

This past fall, Washington became one of the first states (along with Colorado) to pass laws legalizing the recreational use of marijuana. Soon, anyone over the age of 21 will be able to walk into a store and buy up to an ounce of marijuana.

Before Washington journeys into this previously uncharted territory, the state wants to make sure they have the world’s smartest cannabis users to help make sure nothing goes wrong. Enter the 24-year-old unemployed hippie living in his parent’s basement.

“I’m super stoked to be considered for the advisor position,” said unemployed pot smoker Jessie Hall. “I have been having trouble finding a job with the economy and all. This position would be perfect for me because I don’t like working mornings or more than three days a week. I was late for the interview, but besides that, I think it went well.”

In charge of regulating and developing rules for the state’s marijuana industry will be The Liquor Control Board. According to Liquor Control Board spokesman Mikhail Carpenter, there have been thousands of applicants for the job. Although the applicants’ ages range anywhere from 15 to 67, The Liquor Control Board wants to make sure they hire someone who not only has marijuana smoking experience, but solid digital media skills.

“We have been able to sift through the resumes pretty quickly,” said Carpenter. “Most of them were very brief due to a lack of previous work experience. In fact, a number of applicants just sent us pictures of them smoking bowls and joints. One of the finalists for the position just sent us a picture of his apple bowl. Needless to say we were very impressed.”